Archive | February 2013

We Need Stories

I’m taking a break from doing science experiments in my kitchen to bring you another chapter of the Fallens, fresh from it’s first game crash, and just in time for the weekend.

1Jealousy: “I’m helping you mop up, but don’t think it’s in good favor.  I just want you to stop bitching about being too miserable to fix the tub despite there’s only two unhappy moodlets in your box so we can all go ahead and start taking baths again, princess.”

Angela: “Oh happy day!  Thank you so much, Jealousy!  I am so grateful that you are such a good little girl.”

Jealousy: “Please, I beat up your sons for their lunch money every day.”

2So about the crash, I hadn’t saved at least two-three days before Envy’s birthday

SEETHING ANGER

Envy: “I’M ALREADY TIRED OF THIS”

So am I, little fella.

3I have been punished by not saving as often as I should by a toddler fail.

Eunice: “If I close my eyes, I can pretend that I didn’t have a failure of a child.”

Considering she spent the whole time he could have been put to bed sleeping herself, despite not being all that tired, I don’t think he’s the one that should be blamed for failing here.

4Angela can be blamed for her fail.  I blame Angela.

Renauld: “Oh noes, Angela fell down and I can see up her dress.  This is not how I imagined becoming sexually interested in her.”

Move along, old man.

5Fail number three, jeez, I didn’t think I was doing that bad this go around…

Also, someone took a shaving razor to Envy’s forehead in this picture.  No wonder he’s so pissy.

6Angela: “Look Kindness.  No one is willing to put up with your cow mess today.  Or the rest of this legacy for that matter. Go to bed, and no stories.  That is the end of that, you hear me, young man?”

Kindness: “Sigh, fine.  Yes mother.”

7What

WHAT IS THIS CRAP

THIS IS NOT A BED, YOU STUPID TWAT

Kindness: “But if the house is not clean of plates, how can I sleep?  But don’t worry, right after I get finished with these, I will go straight to sleep… after asking daddy if he will read me a story or two.”

I am totally not dealing with you this go around.

8FAIL NUMBER FOUR FOR THIS CHAPTER

Holy shit, I’m on a roll.

9OK, THAT’S ENOUGH

10WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS

Wait, this is Kindness, I know what the fuck’s wrong with him

11Liam’s first appearance this legacy, and he gets off work and goes missing long enough for me to go look for him.  He’s napping around on the benches outside of this work place, apparently for five hours.

12Liam: “I can’t believe this!  Have I died and gone to heaven?  Why, rows and rows of benches, as far as the eye can see!  This is the greatest place on earth!”

13I suppose he won’t come home until he’s achieved his goal of sleeping on every single bench within a two block vicinity.  I guess it’s safer than going home in his mind though.

14Kindness: “Who would have thought, I wouldn’t ever do school work before story time, but yet, here I am, actually doing homework for once!  What’s up with this sudden change around, Jealousy?”

Jealousy: “I don’t know, but STFU and let me finish before I need decay myself out of interest.  I’d like to be able to roll my own trait when I turn 13 and you aren’t helping me.”

15Holy hell Liam.  Are you moving out and becoming a hobo or some shit, dude?

Liam: *Sleeping peacefully, ignoring any family duties he normally doesn’t even do anyway*

16Eunice: “I’m here to tell you that, once again, no one is going to read you a bedtime story, you little shit.  Get your ass to your own bed, and go to sleep!  No one ever wants to ever read to you again!”

17Kindness: “Aha!  That’s where I get you, Auntie!  If I don’t get no stories, I won’t sleep.  And I’m stuck irritating the poo poo out of every single one of you until I get what I want!  So it’s either Dr. Seuss or prepare yourselves for a night time of terror!”

How about I just lock you in a box and let you burn, you little shit.  I was sent a mod to take this out (thanks by the way) but I keep forgetting to install it like an idiot.  You would think I would know better by now.

18After school next day, a couple of the children brought kids home with them, and I checked both of them out and they both have the good trait!  Which means that there is a good chance that either Kindness or Happiness gets to marry one of these… uh, lovely young girls.

Matter of fact, I better do a sweep around town for more people when the boys get older.  Yeah.

19Boy-Girl Child: “Do you just want to do homework instead of actually interacting with anyone in this stinky house?”

Even More Boy-Girl Child than the first one: “Sounds like a plan to me!”

20

Ok, we are back to where we were before the crash.  Welcome back child Envy.

Envy: “It’s not good to be back.”

I know he was hot headed last childhood, but this time he’s stuck as unlucky this go around.  Not as cool.

Jealousy: “Doesn’t matter, I’m still heiress as far as I’m concerned.”

Envy: “I’m going to go out and pout then.”

21Envy: “Standing around really close in the bushes outside really late at night, huh?  That’s what we are doing?  Sounds fine to me.”

22Kindness: “Yeah but do you have to stand so close?  As in, standing right into my kidneys?  I know it’s dark and you can’t see where you are going really, but I just need you to back off a couple of inches?”

Envy: “Aw, keep crying you little baby.”

23BGC: “Now that’s not nice!  He asked you politely to get out of his body and you just stand there and mock him?!  I won’t stand for that!  Get out of Kindness before I push you out, you big meanie!”

Envy: “This coming from the kid who let my sister get beheaded by her own thought bubble last chapter!”

24BGC: “Humph, such a jerk.”

Kindness: “Now why can’t my friends get along with each other?”

Envy: “I’m not your friend you brain dead idiot.”

25Jealously: “LET LOOSE THE DOGS OF WAR!  FOR TONIGHT I WILL REIGN DOWN A SWIFT SLAUGHTER UPON MY ENEMIES AND FOES! *breaks knuckles through the window*”

Evalin: “I think it’s about time we put you on Ritalin or something.”

26Evalin: “It’s good to see you survived being a toddler again, Envy! I still feel the same way about you kiddo, I want to be your friend, but I’ve changed my mind so far about the boarding school!  Instead, I want to give you this, think of it as a birthday present, my dear son.”

Envy: “Oh goodie!  Is it food?!  Because I’m starving to death over here.”

Evalin: “No, it’s an old newspaper.  Think of it as a hint.  To go clean up the front yard.  Go do that now, boy.”

27Next day was Kindness’ birthday (thank fuck) and his mother threw him a party in the yard for her “sweet” little boy.

Envy: “Why does he get a light like this for his birthday?!  Why does he get cake and a party, and no one noticed when I grew up last night?!  What is this crap, am I not any more important to this stupid family as him?!”

Oh stop whining about it, I’m sure your parents are going to want to throw you a party as well… maybe. Ok maybe not, at least you got a birthday present.

28Gary: “I am here, and ready to party for your kid, lady!”

Angela: “Well, uh, what the darn are you wearing?!  That’s not the outfit that was given to you as a makeover the other day!  That’s crap! Gary, where the darn did you get that piece of doggie poo?!”

Gary: “I picked it out all on my own, I don’t want to actually wear something that makes me cool and handsome looking, hell no!  If I want to look like a puke picnic blanket, then by all hell I’m going to wear a puke picnic blanket!”

…Ok then.

29Happiness: “Happy birthday brother!  I’m so excited for you!  Finally, it will no longer be necessary for anyone to have to read a story to you to get you to go to sleep!  That’s what we are most excited for!”

Kindness: “Haha, but don’t worry, I will find something else for me to do to irritate you people with!  Because I love you guys so much :)”

Haha.  Try me, Kindness.

30Remember earlier when Angela passed out on the sidewalk and Renauld declared he was in dire need of viagra?  Well, in the middle of the ceremony I looked forward to, Renauld calls Angela wanting to go on a date with her.  Jeez, can’t he tell when she just wants to be friends with him for campaign money?!

31Angela: “What is wrong with you Renauld?!  You are in a happy marriage right now!  I’m in a happy marriage right now!  Why would you want to go and throw all of that away like that!  We will not date, so please don’t tell me you are romantically attracted to me again!”

Liam: “Yay, she remembered that she still loves me!  Woo!”

Loser, I’m just happy you remembered that you live here.

32Kindness: “Handsome, ridiculously handsome, and with an affinity for the creatures of the sea no doubt!”

Because he’s an idiot, Kindness is now an angler.  Meh.  He’s also a good mix of his parents, he’s got his dad’s innocent little eyes and his mother’s carefree smile.  Strangely enough, on Kindness that actually makes me more irritated towards him than ever.  Smug little shit.

That’s just me though.

33Kindness: “Now that I’m a teenager, I instantly sense a prom coming up for me!  How swell!  I hope there is plenty of inspirational music and a classical atmosphere, because I sure can’t wait to go!”

BGC: “I sure hope I don’t grow up within the next couple of days!  Because as good as I am, I sure don’t want to go to prom with a loser like you.”

Liam: “Mm, cake.”

34Eunice and Evalin had enough of this crap birthday, so they snuck off and got their boogie on in the bedroom.

Forget the guests and stuff in the next room, lovin’s more important.

35Evalin: “In exchange for sexing up Eunice, she made me promise to come out here afterwards to bond with you guys.  I don’t really think it’s a fair trade off, but I guess I don’t mind playing a game with you two twirps.”

Envy: “Yes, mom’s spending time with us!  I am so grateful for this mom, you have no idea.”

Jealousy: “I really don’t know if I really want to know that the reason you are playing with us was to get it on with mom, mother.  That’s gross.”

36Kindness: “~I believe I can fllllyyy…. I believe I can touch the skyyyyy…”

Evalin: “Great, now that his presence is out here, I don’t really think I want to play anymore, kids.  He’s really ruining it for me.”

37Kindness: “GURAHHHH!  BY BACK!  IT’S BROKEN!  Call a doctor, please!”

Evalin: “Haha!  Kindness getting hurt!  Now that is actually much better!  Ok, let’s just continue our game, kids!”

38Kindness: “Hey look, my bones are back in place!  I feel so much better Aunt Evalin!  I just felt like I needed to come and let you know I’m not dead!”

Evalin: “Seriously, kid?!  Do you have brain damage?”

39Kindness: “Bah!  Can we not have a television anymore!  You people know how I feel about television!  It constricts the mind!  It’s a brainwashing device!  Why don’t we replace it with a fishtank or nothing at all, just so long as the television is gone!”

Happiness: “No one cares about your opinion about the television, big brother.  You have got to learn to get over yourself already.  Even I’m saying this.”

40Jealousy: “Hey Kindness!  Remember this?!  Read me a bedtime story, read me a bedtime story, read me a bedtime story!!”

Kindness: “Uh, sure, I mean, bedtime stories are cool and all so I guess I can make some time out to read to you a bit…”

41Envy: “Well if you are going to read her one, you got to read me one first!  I’m the youngest, so I need a bedtime story first!  Kindness, read to me!!”

Kindness: “Sure, sure, just give me a second to gather my thoughts…”

42Jealousy: “EXCUSE ME, but I asked first!  I don’t care what Envy says, read to me, or you will get a fish head in your sleeping bag tonight.”

43Envy: “Read to me first!  Read to me first!!”

Kindness: “Holy crap… this… this is ANNOYING!”

Jealousy: “This is our crowning moment, Envy.  I’m proud to be doing this with you today.”

44Kindness: “No… no!  Jealousy, this isn’t right!  This is my room!  That’s my bed!”

Jealousy: “Wooooow, would you look at that!  And guess what, Kindness!  No one gives a shit!  Get your ass in here and read that book to me!”

I know for my sanity I will get that mod installed for bedtime stories eventually.  But for now, it’s moments like this that justify all the wrongdoings I’ve put up with with this boy.  My night is complete, goodnight everyone!

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