A whole year. Exactly one week short of a whole year to be precise. Am I going for some sort of hiatus record or something? Who knows. The past year has been full of crazy shit like hospitals and broken hearts, but the number one reason for the hiatus is of course the computer. Drivers and all that shit, if you recall. Maybe future hiatuses won’t be so long.
I KNOW I SAY THAT EVERY HIATUS I SWEAR I’M SORRY
We left off on Justice getting her birthday, I remember that much. Honestly that’s all I remember? And I remember that it was the reason I realized something was wrong with the drivers in the first place.Cute as a BUTTON, but naturally, as I do, I wanted to make her look even cuter and match her themes a little better. Game decided that wasn’t such a good idea. Every time I attempted to change her look in CAS, the game would shit out on me. No matter what. Sometimes instantly, sometimes right before I finish up on a wicked cool style.*Greyed out fog of Deadgameitis*
Justice: “Please, don’t leave me in here like this”
One year and one massive computer fix later, the game still decided that most of what I tried on her was JUST TOO MUCH, so her style is so much more simple than I wanted. But at this point I just want to get over this shitty obstacle.
Game graphics, of course, don’t do her justice.
Peace: “You mean I waited a whole year for a tank top and shorts. I could have been in bed all this time instead, it would be more beneficiary to me.”Cynthia: “Talk shit about our daughter’s style and I’ll smear your face into the cake.”
Justice: “I feel the need to sit in a cozy corner in my room and blog for 48 hours straight.”
Her trait is God knows what. It changed so many times and then has been a year since I even looked. We’re going to say her new trait is flip-floppiness, because its probably been everything and more since now.After the party FINALLY ENDED, I had to go find the rest of the family. No idea what they would be up to, and finding them usually didn’t clear the answers for me.
Agony: “No idea where I’m at. No idea what I’m doing. Just know my hair is melting off my face from standing outside in the exposed radiation of this town for 358 days.”
Everyone looks a little funkier now I believe. Or maybe they always did? It’s been a year, I really remember nothing.Serenity is really the only one that hasn’t seemed to suffer too much from toilet graphics. She’s still adorable as all get out.
Serenity: “I try my best to separate myself from the rest.”Justine across town has apparently improved on the other hand.
Justine: “Urghnksgngieneamdfkof fleas”
Maybe its her curse that is plaguing this land now that I think about it…Happiness: *Smashes hand into the mic for four straight hours* “Probably should really retake some vocal lessons. I cannot remember how to voice.”
At least his audience never changes so he never humiliates himself. After the birthday, Peace felt the need to teach Justice how to drive. Just normal skill boosting. But at least its in the new MM that Peace had in his inventory that I never knew he had! Or I did and forgot about it.Justice: “Finally! I have perfected driving!” *Instantly crashes into fence*
So much for normality.
*MM proceeds to abandon them in place as they crunch up together in a mini black hole*
Justice: “No daddy, I cannot drive stick.”
Peace: “Never ever ever ever ever make that joke again while you’re sitting in my lap, hun.”Cynthia probably always had this outfit. I don’t remember. Either way, WHY CYNTHIA.
Cynthia: “Must reach, must work for that dild-I MEAN, that… fat skill bar… yeah… ayyy…”
Wrath: “The fuck is going on why is everyone else making bad sex jokes?! That’s supposed to be MY shtick! Heh heh… get it, “shtick”? “Stick”? …Wow that one was actually shit, even for me.”
Baal: “I thought it was ok enough.”Pretty much off the bat no one has top tier need bars. But at least Serenity isn’t passing out on the ground anymore? At least she’s learning.
Serenity: “I have learned to just not pass out when you are looking, I MEAN zzz”
Justice: “Love my sister. But I really hope she gets enough energy to do her homework soon. She’s failing so far behind now, it’s hopeless…”
Serenity: “Can’t care, bed hair, zzz”*Even further down the walkway*
Agony: “Fuck what da teacher said”
Her grades are actually the best so far, she’s about to hit A+ at her rate. Fingers crossed, I need that for once.Ah. In case I couldn’t forget that this little monster exists.Hysteria: “You know you can’t forget me. In the back of your mind, you know I’m the rightful heiress… I’m the evil one, I’m the one the rules call for… I’m the one that should be holding the house spot, not that car humper, Agony… Even after a year, you can’t forget that it should be me the spot goes to…”
Fuck it off, Hysteria and your smug ass grin and shit. I’ve made up my mind I think. No clones, no heirship! I can break the rule at least once in the legacy, and I’m not sticking around with you! Go back to the boarding school I banished you to!
Hysteria: “Fine… but know in the back of your little mind, you know rule breaking is against your morals… and I will be back… and you will doubt yourself again…”Peace took his father out for a night on the town, mostly for MM boost needs for Happiness, but also because they need some father-son time.
Peace: “With all this rain out here, you don’t think you’re going to melt are you?”
Happiness: “Oh my goat, Peace, for the last time, I’m not a witch!”Happiness: “I… do have something to admit though, son. I have this burden I’ve hid from everyone for years. I’m actually… *phone starts ringing very undramatically* … a vampire.”Peace: “Dimmit, dad! Are you SERIOUS?! For the past 35 years of my LIFE, I just have been telling people you were an oversized pixie!”Happiness: “Ok then? I’m not a vampire? Does that make it better?”
Peace: “Yes, that makes clearly more sense.”
And then I suddenly remembered I couldn’t control Happiness anymore so I stopped making him tell his son all this stuff.
Marlena: “Dark Souls 3 is a pretty good game if you don’t put the disc in and play Mario Party 4 instead.”
Eunice: “Casuals like you do not have a place in the world, Marlena! Get out of my unlife!”Eunice: “Seriously! No sim since you has annoyed me so much as you have in all my years!”
*Cynthia walks by*
Eunice: “Nevermind, you’re SECOND most annoying now!”Wrath: “Later everyone, I’m off to Narnia to do some lion poaching.”
I will never cease using Narnia jokes, even though the only movie I saw was Epic Movie and only book I ever read was the one where everyone dies in a car crash or a train or some shit. Spoilers? I don’t know. I could be thinking of another series for all I know.Peace: “I decided to take all of you to school in the MM today because of mood boosts. Also I really don’t want to start yelling at my children for decomposing grade rates. I cry when I have to do any form of discipline.”
Serenity: “But silly daddy, don’t you remember? It’s a seasonal holiday! We don’t have school today!”
Peace: “By George, you’re right! I guess I’ll take all of you to the party Cynthia was invited to this morning, but can’t make it because she was too busy routefailing over toenail clippings.”Agony: “Hey, you’re forgetting something… you’re forGETTING SOMEONE!! YOU’RE FORGETTING ME!! PEACE!!!”
Justice: “Never been to a party before. Do you think they hurt?”
Serenity: “Don’t know. All I know is I love dogs. I will now love dogs forever. By the way, has anyone seen my glasses?”Justice: “Ah well, time to change into my ~~SUNDAY BEST~~”
Serenity: “Wow. I don’t need glasses to see why we needed to change everything else besides your every day.”
Curse the crash rate.Peace: “Glad to meet you Mr. Van, and must I say your house is lovely. Your party is crap though.”
Van: *Smiles politely and plots a way to piss in this man’s shoes for the insult*Peace: “Long time no see, sister! In game life AND real life! Its great to see you aren’t dead yet.”
Brave: “Thank you child of the earth. No idea who you are, but its nice to have someone grateful I haven’t croaked over yet.”And that was the party. Spring/Love day parties, whatever they are, suck.
Serenity: “But I just figured out how to get up on the porch without blindly tripping over the steps and busting my shins.”Agony: “Fuck them and their MM. I don’t need those losers to take me to a party that’s already over! Look, my whip is here! With my power to befriend vehicles, I can summon any vehicle to my whim!”Agony: “Ay well fuck you too then.”Justice: “As much fun as that party was, daddy, that party was not fun at all.”
Peace: “Then join me in the hot tub. We got to get some use out of this thing, I didn’t drop about 10 grand on this thing for aesthetics, you know.”
Serenity: “Okie then. But just so you guys know, I still love dogs. That hasn’t changed.”
Justice: “Is that going to be your new useless quirk or something?”Justice: “Daddy, please don’t be mad at me, but this is the only bathing suit they had left at the randomly generated CAS discount store.”
Peace: “I will never be mad at you, sweetie, just the universe we live in.”Here’s a good picture of both girls just showing off how cute they are. I adore both of them equally. If Serenity ends up with the good trait, I’ll never be able to decide who would be heiress.Agony: “I don’t understand! Why am I being so isolated by those assholes? All I wanted was to be included in their shitty little old person party and I got abandoned on the sidewalk. I don’t do well with being excluded…”
Baal: “Because you’re trash I MEAN THEY ARE TRASH FUCK YEAH fuck them, do your own thing, you don’t need their approvals.”
Agony: “You’re right! If I want to do things, I don’t need their permission! I’ll do what the hell I want!”
Cynthia: “Please I just want sleep”Peace: “Look girls! The Sims 1 toes.”Serenity: “EW DADDY NO KEEP THOSE AWAY FROM ME”
Justice: “Dad I’ve told you three times already you need to go to the doctor and get those checked out.”Peace: “Er, hey Agony. Would you like to joi-”
Agony: “Scoot over peons, I’m getting in the hot tub whether you want me to or not, and I will not take no for an answer!”
Peace: “We weren’t going to keep you out, but sure, come on in…”Peace: “Agony, dear, this isn’t a snorkel tank, you can’t really swim around in this thing.”
Serenity: “What is she even doing.”And then Agony’s leg got sucked into a drain at the bottom of the pool and she proceeded to drown.
Peace: “Why are my feet purple all of a sudden”
Agony: “HELP YOU PSYCHOS I CANNOT ACTUALLY SWIM”
Peace: “I wish I had this thing insured.”
Agony: *Crab-Dabs her way out of the hot tub*
Justice: “If I get out of this pool, it’s not going to break my arms too, is it?”Agony: “I can’t believe you fuck bricks almost let me die in this thing! Take your shitty hot tub I don’t want anything to do with the damn thing! I’m leaving!”
Justice: “Finally.”However, Agony snapping her leg off in the open drain pipe caused the hot tub to break.
Peace: “You got to be kidding me.”
Agony: “Finally, I did something right! Evil ancestors please witness me.”
And then Peace tried to fix it but it went bad so he wanted to sell it instead. So much for the tub.End of chapter townie updates: This just in, Florida man caught holding his own hand and crying while walking down the street.While going through the family tree to get grips of what’s going on, apparently at some point Anger died. I did not know that (or, for the millionth time, I do not remember if I knew or not) RIP Anger, if I haven’t said RIP before. You leave behind a grape for a granddaughter.And lastly, and definetely least, Hysteria doesn’t like military school 🙂
Hysteria: “THIS IS NOT THE HEIRSHIP I DEMAND”