Just a Couple More Cats

1Trust: “Maybe I should have looked before sitting down.  This chair is unnaturally damp.”

BEFORE I GET TO THE FALLENS, I just want to go off topic real quick.  So recently I attempted to reinstall my sims 2 neighborhoods into this new computer, long story short ended up having to get the files back out of the old computer, which is dead as anything dead can be by now.  Had someone who knew what they were doing save them for me but installing them is it’s own disorder.  Basically, the neighborhood isn’t working and I can’t figure out why and its UPSETTING ME, but I’m still trying everything I can before I lose hope.

However, while my game can’t recognize the neighborhood files, it can recognize the custom content files.  Files I’ve had for over a decade and I can’t barely remember what’s in those files.  And of course, within those files, we have

THIS.WHY, WHY WOULD I HAVE THIS

I’M BEING COMPLETELY HAUNTED BY HUGH HEFNER’S GHOST NOW THERE’S NO OTHER EXPLAINATION

I HAVE NO PURPOSE OR REASON TO EVEN HAVE THIS IN 2 WHY IS IT HERE

Test!Sabrina: “Did you have to crop my face out, was it that bad”2Ugh anyway Love got a make over for her room since it’s only fair that if Trust gets one, she gets one too.

Pandemic and Avarice still sleep on the kitchen floor but that’s neither here or there.3Avarice: “I’m just so happy to have such a good friend as you, EvilGenius!  I’ll always have you to hang out with and love.”

EvilGenius: “Please lemme take a shite”4Here are the girls side by side.  They are both adorable in their own right, but I can’t help but have such a sweet spot in my heart for cute little Trust.

Trust: “That’s because I use the good shampoo and you’ve been wearing that waterlogged hat ever since you dug it out of dad’s old keepsake chest.”

Love: “Sigh, you’re right.  But dad would have been honored I carried on his love of all things western, right?”

Trust: “Oh trust me, I don’t think dad really knew all that much about human western culture even if he got mule kicked into the side of a barn.”5Trust: “Now, we are off to school.  Off to my teenage drama life, where my soul is tormented by the love triangle my friends suffer through every day, over their feelings for Brad the quarterback.  But what about my feelings for Brad?  What about my teenage story, my tale of my youth?”

Anguish: “RAWR I’M FUCKIN’ BARNEY THE DINOSAUR”6Oh and that cat is still in the house.

Zoe: “For the record, this isn’t a cat laser, it’s a government grade cutting laser, and the second the cat tries to smack it with a paw, that paw is coming off!  Heh heh.”

Majora: “Oh.  I see.  I think I’ll pass on this game then.”

Zoe: “OH COME ON IT’LL BE FUN”7Archie: “Either of you foxy foxes want to share some space under my umbrella?  I got plenty of room under here for two…”

Suzette: “Um, I think I’m gonna have to give you a big fat no on that one dude…”

Love: “Oh don’t be rude, Suzette!  He’s showing us kindness, compassion, looking out for us and our well being.”

Suzette: “For fuck’s sake Love it’s not even RAINING.”8Archie: “If you want to stand under the umbrella with me bitch you better keep up, I’m not waiting around on slow hoes like you.”

Love: “Please give me some time Archie, I’m not as fast as you, please!”9Archie: “Yo bitch, this pull down guard doesn’t work on this ride!  Either fix your shit or you’ll be hearing from my lawyer, you understand me?!”

Love: “Archie, that’s not a pull bar, that’s just the closest thing we’ll ever get to keep us from smashing into the windshield when the bus driver has to stomp on the shoddy breaks.”

Archie: “Bitch I ain’t talking to you and didn’t ask!”

Driver: “Oh great.  One of these little asshole delinquents.” 10Suzette: “Hey loser, I’ve invited a friend over from school today.  How about you don’t be so damn weird around them for once?”

Fredrick: *Is too busy measuring something and being disappointed in himself* “Oh.”11DISTRACTION TIME as I do.  Reagan is the newest in the clan and

AND

she is a VAMPIRE?  Which is how?

I dug in her family tree and literally the closest vampire on the tree is her great great grandfather Happiness.  So unless some asshole bit a baby, that is one hell of a recessive gene.12Archie: “THE FUCK KIND OF TRASH PLACE YOU GOT HERE THAT DOESN’T SERVE PROPER SNACKS TO ME AT THE FRONT DOOR?!  I EXPLICTLY TOLD LOVE I NEED TWO MEAT LOVERS PIZZAS THE SECOND I GOT OFF SCHOOL AND YOU ASSHOLES DIDN’T LISTEN TO A WORD I SAID”

Avarice: “I do not vibe with this energy and will be taking my floor nap on the back porch now.”13Pandemic: “DON’T FUCKIN’ INSULT MY HOUSE DUDE, WE DON’T GOT TO CATER TO A FAT ASSHOLE LIKE YOU.”

Archie: “OH YOU JUST WAIT, AS SOON AS MY WRIST POPS BACK INTO PLACE I’M GONNA BITCHSLAP YOU FROM HERE TO THE HOSPITAL.”14Archie: “Anyway, at least my arms will work right when I got my drank on”

How does that not surprise me.15Archie: “Awh.  That’s a shame.  The functionality only went as far as the blender.  Woe is the curse that is my life.”

You’re underaged anyway, go home asshole.16Honestly at this point it wouldn’t surprise me if this thing caught fire on it’s own.

The world: *Decides to burn with it I guess*17Pandemic: “Do you think this is a bad time to tell everyone that I just realized I don’t have a single magical trait in my body and I’m just a regular human?  I’m sad now.”

Hope: “Aw, that’s a shame.  I’ll have to have a proper talk to your father about neglecting to take care of that for you when you were younger.”18Hope: “Oh well” *Magic farts the fire away*

Pandemic: “OH HELL THAT’S NASTY”

Zoe: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY HOT DOGS, YOU’RE TAINTING THEM WITH YOUR STANK”19Then the game managed to start slogging down with some bugs, amazing.

Love: “Honestly, I don’t think it’s the computer, that thing still runs like a top.  I really think grandpa has managed to plague us with an honest-to-god Curse.”

Happiness: “Y’all need to dust the top of the fridge, it’s getting nasty up there.”20Fixed that kinda.  And YOU’RE STILL HERE CAT.

Majora: “Um.  Hi.”

Do you just LIVE here now?

Majora: “Mmmmmmmprobably.”21Love: “Don’t worry little baby, you’re still our number one fuzzy wuzzy in our life.”

EvilGenuis: “Yeah yeah.  I see you eyeing that add option. He’s been here like three days or so already, I know what you guys are thinking.”22Happiness: “Looooooveeeee, youuuuu will doooo my biddinggggg and give me what I most desireeeeee~”23Love: “Grandpa.  I hate to have to tell you but me and Trust have evolved a very complex frontal cortex that cannot be penetrated by your weak, human based supernatural brain waves, so you need to quit.  We aren’t going to break down and buy you any kids meal toys at McDonalds.  You don’t play with them longer than five minutes anyway.”

Happiness: “But… they released those cool Lego cars…”24Rage: “I was told there were cool parrots up here to play with.  Why you ripping me off, Hope?”

I guess the birds are just invisible for life now.  Short of resetting the whole town for them, I can’t bring them back so, what can ya do.25Death: “Oh awkward.  Were you needing to go to the bathroom too?”

Trust: “Uh it was a bad day to visit my cousins in general, huh…”26Fredrick: “I’m sorry you had to see me in this form, Trust.  I will admit though if you can keep my secret.  Yes, all along it was me… I am the grim reaper.”

Trust: “Fredrick not right now, someone in the house is dying and I’m trying to make sure it’s not me.”27Suzette: “Aw, our dog Cairo finally called it quits!  That hurts me so much!  I loved that dog so much.  He’s been my best friend growing up, with us through thick and thin.  My heart is so broken.  But we will feast like kings for a week.”

Trust: “I honestly think it’s time for me to go home now.”28Reagan: “Oh, I was just thinking the same thing!  I went ahead and called your escort.  You’re welcome, thot.”

Trust: “I didn’t do anything to deserve this”29Hope: “IT’S NOT THAT YOU STAYED OUT PAST CURFEW, that rebel stuff is tight, and I respect it, BUT YOU BROUGHT THE GHOST DOG HOME WITH YOU?!  NOW WE WILL NEVER GET RID OF THIS ONE!  I’M ALREADY STUCK PAYING EXTRA HOUSE TAXES ON THE EXTRA STRAY CAT!”

Trust: “Mom calm down, I don’t even think that’s the same dog!  I don’t think…  You know what, I don’t know.  I wouldn’t be surprised anymore, just ground me.”30EvilGenius: “Yeah, this asshole isn’t going to leave my house is he.”

I guess not.  So whatever.  Add another cat to the household, what’s it to me?  Besides, Evil needs a friend, and what better friend than an older mentor cat to be buddies with him.31Of course no sooner had I added him, or as I found out, her, the cat decided that it was time to HAVE BABIES IN THE KITCHEN

Anguish: “Oh good I was starving.”32Oh good GOD, REALLY

FOUR?33Majora, now named Metatron for theme purposes: “Don’t judge me and my conga line.  They perfect.”

I mean sure, but I’ve never had a litter this big before.  Usually I get one or two, I don’t think I’ve seen four in one go before, to be honest.

For names, the light colored one was given a good name, along with her mother, and she is Muriel.  Her siblings, down the line, can belong to Rage’s side, and they are Ifrit, Belial, and Krampus.34Oh good.  I already know which one is going to be the crazy one.

Muriel: “Do not judge my brother, for he knows not what he does.”

Ifrit: “I DO KNOW WHAT I DOES, AND I DOES SEE ALL THE SINS OF HUMANITY.”35Liam: “Wow!  Four kittens!  I will love them with my whole ethereal form!”

Eunice: “I will admit, they are so cute they melt what old crusty hardened heart I used to have.”

Hysteria: “Who the fuck am I standing inside of”36Hope: “Oh, so when a cat gives birth on my floor, everyone plus their grandma has to come in and cheer for it but when I try to do it, it’s “NoOoOo HoPe, YoU’rE tRaCkInG pLaCeNtA aLL oVeR mY cLeAn FlOoR…”

To be fair, Hope.  They are kittens.37I was nosey.  The father of the babies is the Shadow Peacock cat I mentioned once before I think.  I didn’t think I’d even see him ever again.

Shadow Peacock: “I sure Shadowed her with my Peacock if YANNO WAD’IM SAYIN HUEGHUEHUGHUEHGUE”

Metatron: “Was a lot better than Twink Man is all I’m gonna say.”38Hope: “So I do believe I finally got town hall to acknowledge no one in this town wants to work and I think they are finally sending us someone to open this store for us, and no Rage, we aren’t adopting yet ANOTHER cat into the house.”

Rage: “But he’s so cute and little and I like to steal more cats from other people…”

Pandemic: “Wow, how did I get back here?  Am I the worker that runs this store now?  Will I finally get a paycheck so I don’t starve anymore?!  This is fantastic!!”39Pandemic: “Wait, who’s this clown that just popped up out of the ground here?”

Rage: “Son, that’s the REAL store owner. Please get out from back here before she calls the cops on us and gets us booted before Hope can actually buy her stupid shit.”40FINALLY.  The cashiers have been patched and the day has been saved.  The family then went to celebrate at the local park with hotdogs and family togetherness.

Love: “Wait, why are you here Bathroom Hog, I specifically left you behind at the house.”

Bathroom Hog: “Because I want in on these hot dogs and family togetherness!”

Love: “Hog, we aren’t even friends anymore.”41Bathroom Hog: “Oh dang, there really are a lot of people in this park.  Too much togetherness if you ask me.”

Love: “Then literally LEAVE, you dweeb.”42Anguish: “Haha, yes little ground umbrella go!  GO!  Haha that’s hilarious.  I’m so glad I stopped taking my medication for this!”

Every so often this annoying glitch rears its weird, ugly, head.  Sims just love being in the dirt I suppose.43Toaster: “Now hold on tight to my belly fat, least you get slung off and launched to God knows where because I don’t have the gravitational pull that I used to.”

Denver: “Gee Uncle Toaster, thanks for taking me to the park today!  This will be so much fun!”44Denver: “OH NO!  I’M SORRY UNCLE TOASTER!  LOOK OUT!!”

Toaster: “Remember me fondly.”

The resulting crash caused a quake that registered a 6.5 on the richter scale, that everyone from all the way to Starlight Shores felt that day.
46Dayvid: “OH SHIT!! SOMEONE HELP!  I’M BEING CHASED BY A RABID ANGRY UMBRELLA!”

Anguish: “Oh.  Wow.  I see you haven’t been taking my medication either then.  Small world.”45Branch: “Ok enough of that, it’s really hard to fly through the air when you have to tunnel through two feet of earth.”

Archie: “Alright, you bozos.  Apparently no one else knows what you are doing, so I’m going to show you how to do an ACTUAL two step hoe down up in this bitch.”

Gerald: “Um, Archie?  This is the skating rink.”

Archie: “~Gonna do da TWO STEP THEN COWBOY~then~DOSEEDO ON DA~boogie~”

Gerald: “You know what, I’m just gonna… let you do whatever it is you do…”47Hope: “Apparently I’m so good at kicking goal scores that everyone has stopped playing with me.  Just that intimidated by my talent I suppose.”

Could also be the lack of PANTS, what, did you kick so hard that you kicked them OFF or something?!48Belial: “Ah, serene peace I feel watching these fish filets swimming around.  One of these days I’ll be able to order off this menu.”49EvilGenius: “Yeah but trust me, the family won’t let you cook them so I hope you like them raw.  Trust me, the fire place has already tried once before from what I’ve heard.”

Belial: “Then a sushi bar it shall become then!  I can’t wait!”50Oh GOODIE!  You still have some uses after all, Happiness!

Happiness: “That actually hurts my feelings a bit.”

I didn’t say I cared.51Trust: “Mom, I do believe the fridge has been locked again.  I cannot open it.”

Hope: “Well I see Rage hasn’t tried to lock it again for whatever reason he does sometimes, so I think it’s all in your head this time, kids.”

Avarice: “It’s not, I swear!  I’m so hungry I’m tempted to call CPS myself!  Please help, Hope, we beg you!”52Hope: “Guys, this is the good, working, fridge.  There is nothing wrong with the computer we are running on, and I believe y’all are being dramatic.”

Trust: “I’m not, we are serious, mom!  I can’t get to the fridge because my own big butt is in the way!  Please!  I don’t want my fruit roll us getting TOO cold!”53Congratulations you assholes.  Y’all get the ugly fridge now.  I have never used it before so now’s a better time as any to pawn it off on someone.

Trust: “Great.  Now I can never invite my friends over lest they see this monstrosity and never talk to me again.”54Trust: “I still can’t get to the fridge, mom.  Please replace with Less Ugly.”

Hope: “Oh now I KNOW you are being dramatic!  For that I’m cooking dinner tonight and so you better be grateful for whatever tv dinner I pick out for you lazy tikes.”55Hope: “Alright, so do you guys want the salisbury.png or the chickenandpeas.png?  I think we got a little bit of the purpledrank.png left so don’t you kids go fighting over it.”

Trust: “On second thought, can’t we just order a pizza…”56Hope: “The kids are so finicky lately.  I threw a food party for them then.  I am very strategic.”

Gerald: “Yo Pandemic.  Go ahead dude, stick your finger in my turkey hole.  It’s funny as shit man.  I did it the whole ride here.”

Pandemic: “This plan sucks, Hope, I’m not touching anything these nasty people have brought in my house.  If you need me I’ll be outside starving in the yard.”57Wicked: “~~*Hope*~~”

Hope: “Wicked please go eat some of weird Gerald’s turkey before it gets too cold and stop fawning over me.”

Branch: “Hope?”58Branch: “Dearest Hope, I have brought you some beautiful flowers as a way of thanking you for always inviting me to your get togethers and for being the lovely flower that you are.”

Hope: “Oh BRANCH!  They are beautiful!  I will cherish them always!”

Wicked: “Why must you torture my heart so”59Avarice: “So that’s cousin Elaine, huh.  Uncle Wicked’s daughter.  I see she has the cocked up eyebrows going on, so I assume she’s evil if that’s the case.”

Not that hard to even figure out.  Shame, of course, that Wicked was able to give out an evil heir that Rage could not.  Dissappointed.60Pandemic: “Aw, don’t let our evil cousin get you down.  Your birthday is coming up in a little bit and maybe even you will become just as evil, and finally we will have one of us win over our mother’s love.”

Avarice: “I’m literally good you silly bean, but I do appreciate your optimism I guess.”61Pandemic: “Dude I’m serious!  You got to be more optimistic than even that!  You never know!  Maybe you’ll bug out and become the first good AND evil sim ever and mom will have no choice but to love you anyway!  And you’ll be so handsome and so cool for it, and the local bitches won’t have any idea what to do with you!”62Rosalinda: “Cool dude.  Telling your brother all about how to handle the “local bitches”.  Really looks good to us “local bitches”.  Let me tell you.  I’m totally fawning over here over you guys.”

Pandemic: “OH SHIT!  Rosalinda!  I uh, see, uh… oh fuck it, I’m glad this is vodka.”63And so the party ended and Avarice grew up downstairs after everyone called it a night and went to bed.  Sorry little dude.64Hopelessly he is a bookworm.  And he looks like such a nice, sweet, innocent version of his dad.  Poor thing.

Baal Lookalike: “Do I also live here now?”

NO, no more animals this generation!  I’m already stuffed in this house as it is!

About missmiserie

I make sims legacies and update them once every other blood moon :)

One response to “Just a Couple More Cats”

  1. Kiaira says :

    The curse of the playboy bunny outfit

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