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Flea Bitten Love

1Justice: “Not sure if this telescope even works.  I can’t see a single thing out there!”

Might have something to do with you not looking through the actual eye piece.  Just saying.2Or it could also be that I put the dumb thing under the fighter jets.  I doubt there are stars under there.3Justice: “Oh dear, the ghosts have come out.  I hope they like our new home.  And don’t get too lost around here exploring it.”

Don’t think we’ll have that problem with Marlena.  She probably won’t leave the yard.4Hysteria: “She’s out there fucking with the ghosts when she needs to get in here and order some chairs on Amazon before this tub leaves a permanent dent in my ass.”

All in due time.  I’m only changing the house bit by bit so I don’t accidentally trigger a game crash.5Justice: “Granny Angela, please.  Don’t put your head in the chemical mix.  I’m trying to make something nice, but it’s not exactly Hawaiian Punch right now in its current state.”

Angela: “Glub glub”6Angela: “Well since I’m not allowed to drink the window cleaner/clothes detergent mix, I’m going to take a nap.  Can’t wait to break in this new luxurious bed.”

I literally just put that down for Justice, can you not.7Baal: “Are you awake?”

Hysteria: “No I’m not, screw off.”

Baal: “I was just thinking.  In the pretty patties episode of Spongebob, Spongebob knew EXACTLY what he was doing when he destroyed his profits in all those extreme ways.  Because he knew Mr. Krabs was watching, and would find out.  He did it on PURPOSE because he knew that was exactly how he was going to exact vengeance on Krabs for insulting him over his new idea.  Think about it.  Spongebob even told them they would all see his vision, and of all things, he knew Krabs hated wasting money.  So what did he do?  Explain in extreme detail all the ways he destroyed and eliminated all his profits.  And when asked about his success, he rolled his eyes to that reporter and said “I don’t know”.  He knew full well what he was doing.  He only wanted his idea noticed, and the money meant nothing to him.  The only thing more important to Spongebob than his idea in that episode was the Krusty Krab itself, which was the only thing he gave in to Krabs for his idea.  He could have donated that money to the Krusty Krab if he wanted to even, but he didn’t.  He destroyed it.  Only to get back at Krabs for hurting his feelings.  Spongbob is fucking hardcore.  He’s fucking OG for pulling that extreme vengeance shit.”8Baal: “Oh, by the way?  You really shouldn’t sleep with that hat on.  Your hair is gonna rot off and you’ll go prematurely bald.”

Hysteria: “How in the FUCK are you even able to talk to me”

Baal: “Oh I meant BARK”9Hysteria: “The hell is this?  I get out of bed to actually listen to the dog’s advice and change my hair and this dirty bitch just swoops on into my bed?  Get out, Justice.”10Hysteria: “And bitch, why are you even dirty in the first place?”

Justice: “Almost blew the kitchen up last night but it’s ok, because its a new day and we are still alive!  Isn’t being alive great!  I’m going to make breakfast, and we will celebrate our lives with our pancakes on the edge of the bathtub together!”

Hysteria: “Don’t track your nasty sooty socks over my clean floor, and don’t come back into my room ever again.”

11Hysteria: “REALLY?  I chase one bitch off and this one swoops in instantly and takes her place?  Why does everyone got to ruin my morning?!”

Jealousy: “Look, hoe.  I’m your grandma.  I can do what I want.  Move me and I will ensure your life is a living hell.”12Speaking of grandparents, Happiness is still on the treadmill at the gym.

Happiness: “The burn never stops!  Especially for us undead types.  The burn never starts for us.  Seriously, I’m having no issues even after running all night.”

Please don’t starve to death.13I wanted to try to get the girls to focus on looking around the town for potential mates (even though we’re set for Hysteria, its still good to look) and since Hysteria wanted to go to the park, we looked around.  All that’s at the park today seems to be family though.

Serenity: “Nothing wrong with that.  I love spending time with family.”

Hysteria: “I hope you drown in this bucket.”14Hysteria: “How in the deepest hell pit am I supposed to grab these things with this stupid fat lip?!  Honestly, how did Agony not starve to death…”

Naturally Serenity won.
15No vendors at this festival either.  No one works at these stupid things.

Hysteria: “And I WILL stand here until I am allowed to spend my festival tickets!  I DEMAND IT.”

Forget it, its literally not happening.
16Hysteria: “Wow, look who popped out from the dumpster she now lives in.  If its not my face donor.”

Agony: “You BITCH, I’m not living in a dumpster!  I’m just looking for my contact lens.”17Hysteria: “I’ll be generous today.  Beat me in a game of pie devouring, and I will grant you your face back if you win.  If you lose however, you must relinquish your most sacred possession…”

Agony: “Hmmmm, a chance to get my nose back at the risk of my complete CD collection of Usher’s greatest hits?  Sounds worth it to me!”

Hysteria: “I meant your soul, but to be honest that also sounds just as good.”
18Oh, that’s kinda scary to watch.19Hysteria: “I KNEW I would win against no lips!  At least I have an advantage over someone in this world!”

Agony: *Has a blueberry stuck in her last tiny nostril hole and can’t breathe right now*20I guess in the end, at least one of them had a great night.  It isn’t Agony.  She lost all her good CDs 😦

Agony: “Forget the discs, I’m dying, call the hospital…”

21Meanwhile I was scrolling around the town at townies that were keeping clear away from the festival tonight.  So far the only other good I can see is this dude in the cowboy hat and, eh.

Hat: “I uh, am nice to puppies.”

I don’t even remember his name lol22You still over here, Happiness?  Cool.

44: “Whoever told me it was a good idea to exercise without pants is the Devil.  Must not… let… go… don’t want to… lose my member…”23Dee Dee: “Urhm…”

Hysteria: “JUSTICE!  YOUR BITCH IS HERE! COME GET HER BEFORE SHE ENDS UP LIKE THE PAPER BOY!”24Dee Dee: “Nah, I’ll just call her from the safety of my house, bye.”

Hysteria: “Good, don’t come back.”

Justice’s first date night went splendidly.
25Now that I acquainted myself with the town, time to ruin it.  I went on an adding spree and brought in the rescued sims from Hidden Springs.

Veronica: “I was doing well just being lost in whatever sewer I was trapped in in the last town, thank you very much.”

Nascar: “Why won’t I die already”26Jamie also came along, along with his 5 dogs.  His vampirism trait, however, missed its plane to Moonlight and will be late getting here.

Jamie: “You packed all the mutts to keep me company but left behind all my children and beloved ones?!”

Yes, those nasty boring 2 gens worth of sims are gone forever.  Rejoice and start over, Jamie.

Jamie: *Has sad*27And then there’s MEEEEE

Moving along now.
28Tyrone loves his new trailer so much he’s melded into it.

Toaster: “I don’t know these people.  I asked to be left behind to die and I get ignored.  My life is a never ending disaster.”29Toaster walked into his new home and evolved in to Mega Toaster.

Toaster: “Oh, fuck all.”

Tyrone: “Our fiberglass insulation is in my nose but at least it looks like its in good condition.”30Rodrigo!  So glad you could survive!  Welcome to your new home!  Do you like your new family?

Rodrigo: “…” *Instantly moves out*

Cruelty: “The smartest out of all of us.”31Back at the house, Justice has returned from her first day at work in the new town!

Justice: “Being a snitch and working as an undercover hooker has it’s downsides.  Like hooker fleas!  They are more itchy than regular fleas!  But everything is good!  I like all my co-workers!  Except Nasty Natalie.  She gave me fleas.”32Hysteria, determined to not catch fleas from her gross cousin, took a bath in her clothes apparently.

Hysteria: “Buy me a dryer now.”

Sigh.  Dryer and washing machine are now in the garage.  Expect nasty clothing piles for a while.33Because of my settings I realized I can watch the other family members from across the street without the houses being in the way.

Peace: *is dead*

Happiness: *is going for a cross country marathon on that treadmill still*34This is the first time in a LONG time I’ve seen a ghost actually possess something!  Great to see them be active again, even though this is going to wake up and piss off Hysteria for the second night in a row.35Hysteria: “Eh, its ok.  It’s actually kind of funny, seeing as that is Liam’s actual skull after all.”

Liam: *Sobs in his own head*36Justice: “Hey, I have a question for you, if you’re awake.”

Hysteria: “zzmmmmf, I’m NOT.”

Justice: “If your favorite color says that it is hot pink, how come your room is purple?”
37Justice: “Oh, you fixed it.  Hmm.  It’s actually a little more unsettling now in this color.”

Hysteria: “Everybody is a critic.”38Justice: “Oh how I adore Agony so much.  My dearest cousin, and best friend!”

Is that why you shattered your breakfast plate on her carpet and won’t clean it up?

Justice: “Shh, shh, accidents happen, she won’t have to find out.”39Morning socializing on the phones with their potential significant others.

Justice: “Fun.”

Hysteria: “What do you MEAN you’re in social studies class?!  You’re lame. Skip class or screw off for all I care.”40Hysteria: “Since the little gremlin is still in baby school, I want to go see the fortune teller.  I’m gonna knock her out and she’ll never even see it coming.”

She got a fortune about not trusting dead people or something. 41I also had her tattoos fixed because they were peeving me to no end.42Hysteria: “To thank them for fixing the disasters that Justice put on my skin, they can have this pie I found in the parking lot.  It’s old, but I don’t really care.”

*Old tattoo still happening because the tattoo artist is a FRAUD, DAMMIT TRY AGAIN*43Justice: “Is he still here?  Hasn’t it been like 3 or 4 days?  Oh dear.”44Justice: “Grandfather, I’m here to rescue you.”

Happiness: “OH THANK GOODNESS!  I’m about to starve to death!  Could you imagine, they finding my starved, but very built, corpse rolled up in the treadmill?  Horrific, I’d say.”45Justice: “By the way, grandfather, I got fleas.  I don’t recommend coming within ten feet of me, like you are now.”

Happiness: “On the other hand, running away right now might not be a bad investment.”46Justice: “Now that my grandfather has been rescued, I can now continue with my plans tonight with my date!  I sure can’t wait to have a good night in this rain and probably ruin what is probably my future wedding dress that was made in advance for me :)”

Guy who isn’t even here on the lot: “What a lovely thought bubble.  I live here in it now.”47Dee Dee: “Shall I escort you inside, Miss Fallen?”

Justice: “I’m so happy you could make it!  And you look lovely in that dress.”

Dee Dee: “The same could be said for you, my dear.”48And so, their date so easily became one out of a fairy tale.49Dee Dee: *thinks of she keeps dipping Justice away from her, she won’t get as many fleas as possible*

Justice: *Is actually just sweating that hard*50MEANWHILE, ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BRIDGE AT A BAR

Hetal: “I’m not actually old enough to drink on this date but really my age doesn’t stop me from doing so.”

Hysteria: “Hm.”51Hysteria: “I got wants I’d rather do, so take a friendship potion and fuck off until you’re 18!”

Hetal: “You BITCH, you were supposed to buy me alcohol!”52But their date outing went SO WELL due to their newfound friendship and mutual understanding, the outing ended and Hetal went home to do homework.  Or not.  She doesn’t seem like the homework type.53Hysteria: “Hey, skank, where’s the house key?!  My date is over and I’m not pooping in a public restroom!”

Dee Dee: “AGH, she scared me!  I’m sorry about your foot!”

Justice: “You didn’t step on my foot, a giant flea got me good in the leg!  I had to scratch it immediately!”54Then between the bubonic plague from the fleas or the pneumonia from the rain or just Hysteria’s presence in general, poor Justice got sick on her date.

Justice: “That’s just gravy.”55Justice: “I’m so sorry… I didn’t expect to come under the weather as sudden as I did… I got to call the date short, Dee Dee…”

Dee Dee: “It’s ok, dear.  This has been a wonderful night.  And we can have another night like it some other time.  Just rest and get better ok?”

Hysteria: “The fuck is this music.  No wonder you’re so queasy all of a sudden, this is garbage.  I’m gonna play a real song for this shitty club to get down to.”56Hysteria: *Twangs out an acoustic version of Usher’s Yeah song*

Justice: “Whoa she just poofed.  I don’t think I’ll get used to the witchy side of these people in this town.”

Spoiler alert, Dee Dee is also a witch, like Hetal (spoiler alert, Hetal is definitely witch, I don’t exactly say these things, but I think it was just obvious with her get up)

Anyway, here we end the chapter until the next chapter.

 

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The New Locals

1To placid and cool Moonlight Falls!  Look at how crisp and clean it is.2Moonlight was chosen as our new town since I spent a while researching other towns, trying to research all the good and evil townies and deciding based on that.  But I decided that wasn’t as fun as moving to an unknown town and finding who is good/evil as a surprise.  So between Moonlight Falls and Isla Paradiso, or buy an entirely new town altogether (and risk tanking my computer), I chose Moonlight, as it best seemed to fit the family’s themes.3So, lets officially give our heiress’ the reins and introductory cards to go on the facts pages.  Hysteria’s full list of traits now reveal her to be brave and neat, along with everything else.

3And Justice for the record as well.4They were moved into a pre-made house solely because I just didnt want to deal with lag and crashes while dealing with build mode, even though the new town runs so smoothly right now.  I just didn’t want to jinx it.

Justice: “There is nothing wrong with this!  Such a lovely, modest house, and it’ll really perk up once I hang some nice sunny curtains around the living room.” 5Hysteria: “I don’t understand.  We have half a million simoleons and we pick a dumpy renter house?  As heiresses we should have the pick of the mill, shouldn’t we?”

Justice: “We don’t need wealth to be happy!  Simple and contemporary is where it’s at.  We start a simple life on a smaller lot, and our lives will run so much smoother and better, and we will be happy!  You’ll see!”

Hysteria: “Hm we’ll see how much happier and smoother you’ll be when I run your face over this splintery old floor.”
67Super fast tour of the house lay out.  It really is simple.  As time goes on I’m sure I’ll build onto it and I’m going to, for the most part, let their wishes dictate what type of furniture we get.8There’s plenty of space.  A very humble back yard that just needs the right Fallen touches to make it home.
9There we go.  All done and normal now.10Agony: “Hey.  A mailbox just materalized across the street.  Did we just get new neighbors?”

Nope.  I ended up having the family buy a second lot because even though I said I wasn’t going to build a house for these guys, I uh, ended up building a house for these guys.

I never said I was good at sticking to plans.

12Welcome to the “secondary” home for the Fallens!  Here is where the family members I don’t play with can hang out in (until they wander back over to the main house and refuse to leave for I’m sure many reasons).

I can’t find any rules saying they can’t have their own “retirement” homes.  It’ll probably end up being the main home anyway, but at the rate my game drags down, a lot of sims on one lot probably doesn’t help.  So they can “move out” without moving out.  It’s a win win!14Starting the tour, with Wrath!  Come on into your new abode, you earned it!

Wrath: “I earned shit?  What kind of unfinished dump is this, you forgot to fucking recolor the roof walls, what kind of craftmanship is this?!”

Well you can always live in a dumpster for all I care really.
15Wrath: “What a living room.  I can’t wait to drink cyanide in here and die surrounded by furniture like this.”16Wrath: “You’ll listen to my jokes for the rest of my days, won’t you?”

Statue: “I was told I was being ported into an Elder Scrolls game, not this mess.  I wish for death and corruption.”

Wrath: “That’s the spirit!”17Across the yard, Happiness and Peace were less picky about their set up.

Happiness: “Can’t wait to actually get some paint and match the wood grains of the windows up to the front door.”

Nevermind.  They’re picky.
18Happiness: “Love this view of the living room!  I can see behind the tv from here!”

Nice, simple, bright style.  A lively house that my lively boys will enjoy.
19Too bad I apparently can’t remember how to add fish in the fucking fish tank, they just BODY SLAM THEMSELVES THROUGH THE DAMN THING AND LAY THERE

Tuna: “I’m ded lol”20Ok, time to three speed through this tour, because the laziness kicked in.  I used blueprints, by the way, to get a layout and a decent symmetry of the two houses.  Just like with the other house, it’ll evolve into a proper Fallen house over time.21The good house got a gym and an art studio, along with their basics, and the evil house got a back foyer and a home entertainment room.  Bedrooms and spare bedrooms will get prettyfied as time goes on.22Evil backyard poolside and garden…23Good backyard side and garden.  May it stay clean and simple.24Hysteria: “You mean to tell me… my shitty mother and her bumfuck cousins get the penthouse treatment and I’m forced to shovel it in this dump asbestos packed town house?  If that isn’t the largest load of shit I’ve been dealt with since living my whole life in a boarding school…”

Be happy.  Why aren’t you happy?  I abided by your first wish.  You were given a potions table.  Go blow your kitchen up and be happy.

Hysteria: “At least I got poisons to play with and die to.”

Not what I meant I think.25Agony: “Well, there goes Serenity, taking off instantly to be free in this new world…  No need for her to stay in this family and take up space, so maybe… I should too.  I should also take this opportunity to restart my life.  Take up a new name, a new title, and start fresh.  This could be my chance of a lifetime…”26And with that, Serenity finally left the family roster, and Agony went her way.  Forging her own path in the opposite direction, letting the sidewalk take her to destinations anew.

Sike, I moved them out together into an even tinier house next to a graveyard somewhere.  27In doing so, I looked around this town again since I don’t remember much from the Supernatural playthrough at this point.  The weather stone usually lands in interesting locations, but this one decided to pick a very bland and uninteresting spot to bore me with.29I don’t recall there being well houses in the sims, but there are a few in this town, and I find them so cute!  They clearly aren’t built in build mode, so I wonder if they are hidden items in testing mode or something.28This one is a bit ominous to me.  A chain on a well house either means something is being kept out… or kept in.

Then again.  It could just be for security purposes.  After all I’m used to secret back sheds having dead bodies in them at this point.

Edgardo: *Ghostly distant frustration groans*30The decrepit abandoned house in the middle of town looks just as spooky as ever.  I should peek around here at night and see if any spookies hang around this place, like the mineshafts at Twinbrook. 31Speaking of, I’m feeling a lot of Twinbrook homey vibes now!  A budding trailer park!  Can’t wait to make friends with the locals in this town.32Anyway, got horribly distracted and tried to find well houses in buy mode and debug mode and town edit mode, etc, and I just can’t.  I actually can’t find half the stuff I could have sworn I used to have access to… and ended up decorating the town with random stuff.  Like the Island Paradise statues.  This one looks over the town on one side, protecting it from harm and evil.33The one placed on the other side of town… doesn’t give the same vibe to be fair.  He kinda looks less protecting and more menacing from this point of view.  I tried not to though.34Added another on the beach for good measure.  Got to protect the legacy family from crazy Death children trying to build maze dungeons for their evil reasons.35Added a couple more in the ocean to protect the town against Cthulu and pirates but effed up and one of them is magically floating and I can’t fix him so let’s just go back to the legacy house for the time being.36Justice: “All that neat stuff in Edit Town and all you give us is a stop light.  In the middle of our street.”

In hind sight, and to be fair, it will probably do more good than a yield sign at a cross road.  But then again I know as much about proper signs in proper places than sims do about actually driving.
37Happiness: “Alright then, with that I’m out to do a bit of work.  Time to dazzle this town and get me some new fans!  Watch the house while I’m gone, son!”

Peace: “I think that’s what I was already doing, since I haven’t moved from this morning…”38Time to get started on scouting the town.  Justice wants to start her wishes by meeting someone new, and what better way to look for good and evil sims.

Justice: “Howdy!  I just moved into town and cannot wait to get to know our new, wonderful neighbors!”

Janet: “Neat.”39Janet: “K, bye.”

Justice: “Well she nyoomed away so fast it about took my face off.  No matter.  I’m sure she has other things to do, and we’ll probably be fast friends soon, as she’s going to be one of my co-workers from the looks of things!”
40Wrath: “No wait.  Hold on.  I’m formulating a good dick joke if you give me five more minutes.”

Nah.  Just making sure y’all haven’t burned the place down yet.  Carry on.41Happiness: “LAME.  No good traited people here for my granddaughter, just stinky hippies recycling the local garbage for the good of the environment!”

Rainflower: “Babe, I don’t like this guy… he’s… he’s wearing a real leather coat!”

Happiness keeps getting song-a-grams and it helps to scout the town.  So far there’s nothing to find though.

42You guys still boring as ever I see.

Wrath: “At least I’m putting effort into it.  Fartass over there thinks he’s going to live on the sidewalk forever.”

Peace: “Nah, it’s just… Dad took the house keys with him when he went to work.  I got to wait til he comes back and lets me in.”43Hysteria: “YES.  Finally finished my first wish.  Now to pour it in Justice’s morning orange juice and head to town to meet some new people of my own!”44Hysteria: “Listen to my guitaring and appreciate my presence, you peons.  Else you will be burnt down with this shack.”

Argus: “Burnt down…?  To be honest that might be less painful than the guitar twanging.”

Pappy: “I don’t know, the high pitched string plucking sounds like a nice warm dog whistle and it really revs my engine.”
45Justice: “Coming in to watch a cooking channel real quick!  Got the urge to watch some Chopped!  Anyone want to join me?!”

Hysteria: “Can’t go an hour without her in my ass, can I.”46Happiness: “You look like you’re in the need for a song-a-gram, sir.  How about it?  Spend a meager $800, I’ll rip off a feel good song for 10 seconds to boost your mood.  It’s a good deal if I say so myself.”47While Happiness makes that mad pay money, I finally found a Good sim to keep in mind!48Happiness: *Doesn’t actually sing, just breaks down in the chicken dance for a couple seconds*

Deedee: “Wow, you were right!  It really was worth two of my paychecks!”49Deedee: “Wait… why do I have a sudden fear of a presence… one of a legacy kind…”

Justice: “Please!  I ran across town just to meet you!  And potentially share recipes I learned on Top Chef!”50Deedee: “Well I do love a good cooking show.  Apparently my bio says I like cooking.  My traits don’t but then again when’s the last time traits effected how people interact with anything, haha.”

Justice: “You’d be surprised.”52Justice: “Anyway.  I like you.  Have some hearts.  I hope you come around to Netflix and grill with me sometime.  Sincerely, and it will be fun, we can learn how to cook together.”

Deedee: “That’s actually very sweet of you.  I think I would like to take you up on that offer.”51Justice: “Also I think I should apologize for my brash and silly grandpa.  Sometimes he can be a bit energetic.”

Happiness: “Can’t wait to get my muscles back!  Gonna be thicc for like, a week!  Gotta feel the burn I mastered ages ago and never picked back up!”53Meanwhile, about a block from the house, someone gave me a notification that they started a career in photography… in this weather and in this lighting, I can’t say it’s going to be a successful career start…54Hetal: “Eh.  Photography isn’t real art anyway.  It’s just a nice profitable scam I can sell to the Louvre or whatever that shit is.  Just send them my foggy black nature shots and call it art.  Easy fifty grand per photo probably.”

Oh, an Evil jackpot I have landed on here.
55Hysteria: *Flies over at breakneck speeds for an introduction* “FUCK she’s like a full head shorter than I am.”

Hetal: “I sure hope I don’t fail the ninth grade again this year.”

No problem.  No rush.  We got plenty of time to build at least a solid friendship.
56Hetal: “Join me, stranger.  Let us have a nice lunch that I may or may not have poisoned myself.”

Hysteria: “A chance to eat a poisoned burger?!  I woman after my own heart!”
57Hysteria: “… I just sat down in a fucking water puddle didn’t I.”

Hetal: “Isn’t that cold, horrid feeling just the best?  Gloomy, miserable nights like this are the best to have a picnic in.”58Well, at least for Hysteria, picking her future mate wasn’t hard at all.  Hetal is a must have for the Fallens.

Hysteria: “And with her black magic and all things gloomy, we will rule this town with an iron fist!”

Hetal: “And iron wrists!  I hope.  Since I just destroyed both of mine just now.  Hurts like a bitch.”

Face Off

1WAIT

NO THAT WASN’T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN

I DIDN’T REALLY PLAN FOR THAT2The hospital has a shit care plan so Agony wakes up post-surgery in the rain on a hard park bench.

???: “Yeah, but I woke up on my bench first.”3???: “Wake up you insect, and witness my perfection.”

Agony: “Mmmzzzz, wuah… wazzat?  Tommy Wiseau is that your voice?”4Hysteria: “(You dumb block of rank cheese, no), it’s me, your replacement and the new offical heiress to the Fallen dynasty!  The new Agony, and you… you’re now whatever that hobo in the scrubs made.”5HHHHHHHHH TOO CLOSE IN

WHAT DID THOSE PEOPLE DO TO YOU6Agony: “My… my nose!  My lips… what did you tell them to do to my face?!”

Hysteria: “Just a fairly easy transplant from you to myself.  The dude doing the surgery then found whatever he had lying around to stitch up your holes.  I’m pretty sure your nose used to be an old toe.”7Agony: “WHY of all things, steal parts of my face?!  The vast majority of our faces were the SAME!  I think the only things you really took were my ears, lips, and boobs!  What is the point of all that?!”

Hysteria: “I needed perfection!  I need to be able to walk into the house without those other clowns realizing that the real Agony is gone and I’m an imposter!  There is no room for flaw!”

Agony: “Oh good luck getting past them like that!  The doctors clearly couldn’t transfer my fashion sense so what are they gonna say when you walk in with missing textures?”

8Hysteria: “You think they’d even notice that?  They’re dumb video game characters that would rather stand in one spot for 7 hours then pass out rather than walk up a flight of stairs to their bedroom, you really think they can see a difference between blue and purple?  This is nothing.”

Agony: “You… you really are psychotic… to break the fourth wall like that… that’s just horrible.”9Agony: “It won’t last!  They aren’t THAT stupid!  They will see past it all eventually, you can’t get down all my traits and quirks, and look!  You can’t even control my face for more than four minutes!  You’ve already busted my lower lip!”

Hysteria: “AW, FHUR FHAWKS SAKE! ‘OW DO YOU TALK WIFH DISS AH’LLOON AH’ YOUR AH’CE!!”10Hysteria: “‘Ou wait right here, an’ whe’ I geh ‘ack h’rom ge’ing a new collegen s’ot, ‘ou ‘etter ‘e gone!”

Agony: “Bitch try me.”

11Hysteria: “Listen, if I so much as see you in my houh’e e’h again I will sh’trangle you in ‘ront of de ‘amily and clan’g you as an e’r crone created by dat stu’id Secksie ro’ot frong down de street.”

Agony: “English bitch can you speak it!”12Hysteria: “Now that that has been fixed.  Begone from me.  I never want to see you around me, my legacy or my property ever again.  As I said, I will murder you and make you look like a new busted bone maid if you wander into the same room with me ever again.”

Agony: “That’s so evil! You can’t get away with it, they’ll find out!  Justice will SURELY see through it!  She’s a cop now, she will punish you! Just how can you do this to your own sister! “13Hysteria: “Very easily when I was forced away and had nothing to do with any of you for my entire life.  Goodbye Agony.  It was shit knowing you.”14Agony: “How could she do this to me… she took everything!  My life… my family… even my most precious possessions, my boobs!”15Agony: “I have never been so disgraced in my life, and so furious and heartbroken and angry and sad… where do I go from here!”16Bonus.

Agony: “It was YOU.  YOU’RE THE ONE THAT WANDERED INTO THE HOSPITAL AND MUTILATED MY FACE”

Jarrett: “What in the FUCK ARE YOU”17So far the rest of the family is oblivous, WHAT A SURPRISE.  Happiness was invited to his daughter’s holloween party, which is scary on its own not loading like this.

Charity: “There’s nothing scary, its decorated!  The theme is grey.  It matches my holloween outfit:  Grey.”

Happiness: “I guess I’m just happy you found a house to live in.”18Happiness: “My holloween outfit is nothing too adventurous but it kinda matches my best bro, whom I can sense from here.”19Jaime: “I like hiding away from the rest of the party and feeling up on my own ass.  This is how I spend my time these days.”20Jaime: “Don’t tell me you came all the way in here with social intentions just to cancel and stare at me.  That’s so lame.”

Happiness: “My actions are severely limited.  I just really wanted to at least see you again dude.  It’s been a while.”

Jaime: “Are we even friends anymore.”

21Ariel: “There is something… wrong with this one.  I don’t recognize it.  It’s not Agony, and it possesses a great amount of evil within it.”

Hysteria: “If it weren’t just a cat no one even pays attention to I would be concerned.  So get lost.  There’s nothing wrong with me.  It’s just I, Agony.  Now move along and go lick your anus or whatever you do around here.”22Ariel: “Yeah, Agony.  Because that’s exactly how Agony sounds and acts and drinks out of her mug.”

Hysteria: “What do you mean.  I am doing nothing wrong.  Sip sip.  Mmm.  Kool-aid or whatever.  *lip falls off in the cup*  ‘Uckin ‘hit not dis ‘hit again”23Agony: “That bitch thinks she can ban me from my own house.  I lived here before mom ever decided to crank her unwanted ass out!  I’m still on this family roster and I would LOVE to see her try to force me out of this property!”

Baal: “Hi Agony”

Agony: “Not right now you little shit, where’s the bookcase and the wall art?!”24Agony: “Actually… where is anything?  Where is everyone?  Hello, is anyone in here?”

Justice: “Hello, how can I help you today?”25Agony: “Oh thank god, Justice!  Someone with some sense!  I have to explain everything to you!  There’s an imposter amongst us, she came from-”
26Justice: “I hate to interrupt you, strange person, but we are in the process of packing all our belongings.”

Agony: “Strange person?!  Oh please don’t tell me Hysteria was right and you can’t recognize me!  Please Justice!  You have to listen to me, it’s of upmost importan-“27Agony: “What… What the fuck… where did the house go?  Where did anything here go??”28Justice: “I told you.  We are packing our belongings.  We plan on moving and broadening our horizons in a new town.  You are free to come with us and save yourself from this town’s destruction if you want to.”

Agony: “WHAT IN THE TEN FUCKS”

Bottle from like three gens ago: “Please end my existance.”29So in finally leaving this gear grinding town, I packed the family and packed the townies that I wanted to save.  In that process though, apparently someone in the Arwing family is a fucking.  WEREWOLF.  And I can’t pack them up because lycanism is too FUCKING CONFUSING FOR THE GAME ALGEHWIAOGKDJSAL30PRAY TELL, GAME, WHO HERE LOOKS LIKE A WEREWOLF

Game, in tears: “I… I don’t… I don’t know what they are at all!”

31Is it you, Cruelty?  Are you the werewolf?

Cruelty: “I’VE BEEN IN THIS HALLWAY FOR YEARS WHEN IS GOD GOING TO END MY SUFFERING”

Arwing: “My diet is working!  I’m about ready for my summer beach vacation :)”

I’m proud of you I think.
32Cruelty: “Aw, FUCK.  It’s walking like a damn zombie now!  Please don’t pack me with these losers, let me die in this horrible town!!”

Tyrone: “FEED ME SPLEENS”33Cruelty: “YOU ARE SO FUCKING UGLY”

Tyrone: “FEAR ME I’M A REPUBLICAN VOTER”34So it turns out Tyrone IS the mystery werewolf, along with being a broken zombie apparently.  That only turns into a proper zomwolf right before bed?  I don’t even know anymore.

Tyrone: *eyes bleed out right before a good night sleep*35Anyway, for some reason I can’t just reset him out of that state in order to pack him up, not even if I restart the whole town, so I’m forced to wait until the morning to save them and put them in the library, so the family has to wait.

Wrath: “I’M DYING OUT HERE!  GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER TYRONE”

Peace: “While I find Wrath is overreacting for the most part, it is cold out here.  Can someone unpack some mittens if I’m to stand out here for the remainder of the night?”36Justice ended up taking them to the salon to stay until morning.  Listening to them gripe is just sad.

Peace: “Now this is what I call shelter.  I really like our temporary new house.”

Serenity: “I still exist!”37In the meantime I’ll give the heiresses their legacy tattoos.  Family tradition and all.

Justice: “I may not be scared of needles, but I am afraid of the dark!  Hold me Agony!  I don’t like being alone in here!”

Hysteria: “If you even so much as fucking touch me I will rip your fingernails out one by one and put them in your eyelids.”38Justice: “What in all that is good is wrong with you, Agony?!  That wasn’t something you would normally say…”

Hysteria: “Oh shit sorry, I meant, um, beep beep.  I think the dark is swaggy.  Tattoo me and what all meanwhile I’ll jack it to that car photo on the wall because I think vehicles are my friends.”
39Justice: “I don’t know… something is off with Agony… I think a brainworm may have gotten into her head or something?”

Hysteria: “Behold.  My cool tits.  The only thing I love more than cars.  They lactate and everything!”40Meanwhile, the real Agony is still moping around.

Agony: “Can’t I just get an optical illusion tattooed on my face to give me the appearance that I still have a nose?  Even if its just that, please, I hate this raspy whistle it makes whenever I breath in!”

41For all their whining and complaining, the Old Folks Club still slept out in the cold rain on benches.  I guess if it keeps them quiet.42Justice: “I incorporated all my artistic license into this.  I know you asked for the devil wings, but I think these will make you look more… friendly.  The heart I took special liberty in to express my love for you.”

Hysteria: “That’s it.  Give me your fingernails.”43Peace: “Well, morning is here, father.  And I think that hobgoblin family has gone back to normal and been packed in the boxes.  Shall we make our leave and find a new town to make our lives in?”

Happiness: “Yeah!  Let’s bounce before its too late.”44And with that, we leave our long beloved Hidden Springs, that cradled our legacy from the beginning.  As it creaks down to it’s now gloomy and creaky current state, the Fallens bid it farewell as they travel…