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The New Locals

1To placid and cool Moonlight Falls!  Look at how crisp and clean it is.2Moonlight was chosen as our new town since I spent a while researching other towns, trying to research all the good and evil townies and deciding based on that.  But I decided that wasn’t as fun as moving to an unknown town and finding who is good/evil as a surprise.  So between Moonlight Falls and Isla Paradiso, or buy an entirely new town altogether (and risk tanking my computer), I chose Moonlight, as it best seemed to fit the family’s themes.3So, lets officially give our heiress’ the reins and introductory cards to go on the facts pages.  Hysteria’s full list of traits now reveal her to be brave and neat, along with everything else.

3And Justice for the record as well.4They were moved into a pre-made house solely because I just didnt want to deal with lag and crashes while dealing with build mode, even though the new town runs so smoothly right now.  I just didn’t want to jinx it.

Justice: “There is nothing wrong with this!  Such a lovely, modest house, and it’ll really perk up once I hang some nice sunny curtains around the living room.” 5Hysteria: “I don’t understand.  We have half a million simoleons and we pick a dumpy renter house?  As heiresses we should have the pick of the mill, shouldn’t we?”

Justice: “We don’t need wealth to be happy!  Simple and contemporary is where it’s at.  We start a simple life on a smaller lot, and our lives will run so much smoother and better, and we will be happy!  You’ll see!”

Hysteria: “Hm we’ll see how much happier and smoother you’ll be when I run your face over this splintery old floor.”
67Super fast tour of the house lay out.  It really is simple.  As time goes on I’m sure I’ll build onto it and I’m going to, for the most part, let their wishes dictate what type of furniture we get.8There’s plenty of space.  A very humble back yard that just needs the right Fallen touches to make it home.
9There we go.  All done and normal now.10Agony: “Hey.  A mailbox just materalized across the street.  Did we just get new neighbors?”

Nope.  I ended up having the family buy a second lot because even though I said I wasn’t going to build a house for these guys, I uh, ended up building a house for these guys.

I never said I was good at sticking to plans.

12Welcome to the “secondary” home for the Fallens!  Here is where the family members I don’t play with can hang out in (until they wander back over to the main house and refuse to leave for I’m sure many reasons).

I can’t find any rules saying they can’t have their own “retirement” homes.  It’ll probably end up being the main home anyway, but at the rate my game drags down, a lot of sims on one lot probably doesn’t help.  So they can “move out” without moving out.  It’s a win win!14Starting the tour, with Wrath!  Come on into your new abode, you earned it!

Wrath: “I earned shit?  What kind of unfinished dump is this, you forgot to fucking recolor the roof walls, what kind of craftmanship is this?!”

Well you can always live in a dumpster for all I care really.
15Wrath: “What a living room.  I can’t wait to drink cyanide in here and die surrounded by furniture like this.”16Wrath: “You’ll listen to my jokes for the rest of my days, won’t you?”

Statue: “I was told I was being ported into an Elder Scrolls game, not this mess.  I wish for death and corruption.”

Wrath: “That’s the spirit!”17Across the yard, Happiness and Peace were less picky about their set up.

Happiness: “Can’t wait to actually get some paint and match the wood grains of the windows up to the front door.”

Nevermind.  They’re picky.
18Happiness: “Love this view of the living room!  I can see behind the tv from here!”

Nice, simple, bright style.  A lively house that my lively boys will enjoy.
19Too bad I apparently can’t remember how to add fish in the fucking fish tank, they just BODY SLAM THEMSELVES THROUGH THE DAMN THING AND LAY THERE

Tuna: “I’m ded lol”20Ok, time to three speed through this tour, because the laziness kicked in.  I used blueprints, by the way, to get a layout and a decent symmetry of the two houses.  Just like with the other house, it’ll evolve into a proper Fallen house over time.21The good house got a gym and an art studio, along with their basics, and the evil house got a back foyer and a home entertainment room.  Bedrooms and spare bedrooms will get prettyfied as time goes on.22Evil backyard poolside and garden…23Good backyard side and garden.  May it stay clean and simple.24Hysteria: “You mean to tell me… my shitty mother and her bumfuck cousins get the penthouse treatment and I’m forced to shovel it in this dump asbestos packed town house?  If that isn’t the largest load of shit I’ve been dealt with since living my whole life in a boarding school…”

Be happy.  Why aren’t you happy?  I abided by your first wish.  You were given a potions table.  Go blow your kitchen up and be happy.

Hysteria: “At least I got poisons to play with and die to.”

Not what I meant I think.25Agony: “Well, there goes Serenity, taking off instantly to be free in this new world…  No need for her to stay in this family and take up space, so maybe… I should too.  I should also take this opportunity to restart my life.  Take up a new name, a new title, and start fresh.  This could be my chance of a lifetime…”26And with that, Serenity finally left the family roster, and Agony went her way.  Forging her own path in the opposite direction, letting the sidewalk take her to destinations anew.

Sike, I moved them out together into an even tinier house next to a graveyard somewhere.  27In doing so, I looked around this town again since I don’t remember much from the Supernatural playthrough at this point.  The weather stone usually lands in interesting locations, but this one decided to pick a very bland and uninteresting spot to bore me with.29I don’t recall there being well houses in the sims, but there are a few in this town, and I find them so cute!  They clearly aren’t built in build mode, so I wonder if they are hidden items in testing mode or something.28This one is a bit ominous to me.  A chain on a well house either means something is being kept out… or kept in.

Then again.  It could just be for security purposes.  After all I’m used to secret back sheds having dead bodies in them at this point.

Edgardo: *Ghostly distant frustration groans*30The decrepit abandoned house in the middle of town looks just as spooky as ever.  I should peek around here at night and see if any spookies hang around this place, like the mineshafts at Twinbrook. 31Speaking of, I’m feeling a lot of Twinbrook homey vibes now!  A budding trailer park!  Can’t wait to make friends with the locals in this town.32Anyway, got horribly distracted and tried to find well houses in buy mode and debug mode and town edit mode, etc, and I just can’t.  I actually can’t find half the stuff I could have sworn I used to have access to… and ended up decorating the town with random stuff.  Like the Island Paradise statues.  This one looks over the town on one side, protecting it from harm and evil.33The one placed on the other side of town… doesn’t give the same vibe to be fair.  He kinda looks less protecting and more menacing from this point of view.  I tried not to though.34Added another on the beach for good measure.  Got to protect the legacy family from crazy Death children trying to build maze dungeons for their evil reasons.35Added a couple more in the ocean to protect the town against Cthulu and pirates but effed up and one of them is magically floating and I can’t fix him so let’s just go back to the legacy house for the time being.36Justice: “All that neat stuff in Edit Town and all you give us is a stop light.  In the middle of our street.”

In hind sight, and to be fair, it will probably do more good than a yield sign at a cross road.  But then again I know as much about proper signs in proper places than sims do about actually driving.
37Happiness: “Alright then, with that I’m out to do a bit of work.  Time to dazzle this town and get me some new fans!  Watch the house while I’m gone, son!”

Peace: “I think that’s what I was already doing, since I haven’t moved from this morning…”38Time to get started on scouting the town.  Justice wants to start her wishes by meeting someone new, and what better way to look for good and evil sims.

Justice: “Howdy!  I just moved into town and cannot wait to get to know our new, wonderful neighbors!”

Janet: “Neat.”39Janet: “K, bye.”

Justice: “Well she nyoomed away so fast it about took my face off.  No matter.  I’m sure she has other things to do, and we’ll probably be fast friends soon, as she’s going to be one of my co-workers from the looks of things!”
40Wrath: “No wait.  Hold on.  I’m formulating a good dick joke if you give me five more minutes.”

Nah.  Just making sure y’all haven’t burned the place down yet.  Carry on.41Happiness: “LAME.  No good traited people here for my granddaughter, just stinky hippies recycling the local garbage for the good of the environment!”

Rainflower: “Babe, I don’t like this guy… he’s… he’s wearing a real leather coat!”

Happiness keeps getting song-a-grams and it helps to scout the town.  So far there’s nothing to find though.

42You guys still boring as ever I see.

Wrath: “At least I’m putting effort into it.  Fartass over there thinks he’s going to live on the sidewalk forever.”

Peace: “Nah, it’s just… Dad took the house keys with him when he went to work.  I got to wait til he comes back and lets me in.”43Hysteria: “YES.  Finally finished my first wish.  Now to pour it in Justice’s morning orange juice and head to town to meet some new people of my own!”44Hysteria: “Listen to my guitaring and appreciate my presence, you peons.  Else you will be burnt down with this shack.”

Argus: “Burnt down…?  To be honest that might be less painful than the guitar twanging.”

Pappy: “I don’t know, the high pitched string plucking sounds like a nice warm dog whistle and it really revs my engine.”
45Justice: “Coming in to watch a cooking channel real quick!  Got the urge to watch some Chopped!  Anyone want to join me?!”

Hysteria: “Can’t go an hour without her in my ass, can I.”46Happiness: “You look like you’re in the need for a song-a-gram, sir.  How about it?  Spend a meager $800, I’ll rip off a feel good song for 10 seconds to boost your mood.  It’s a good deal if I say so myself.”47While Happiness makes that mad pay money, I finally found a Good sim to keep in mind!48Happiness: *Doesn’t actually sing, just breaks down in the chicken dance for a couple seconds*

Deedee: “Wow, you were right!  It really was worth two of my paychecks!”49Deedee: “Wait… why do I have a sudden fear of a presence… one of a legacy kind…”

Justice: “Please!  I ran across town just to meet you!  And potentially share recipes I learned on Top Chef!”50Deedee: “Well I do love a good cooking show.  Apparently my bio says I like cooking.  My traits don’t but then again when’s the last time traits effected how people interact with anything, haha.”

Justice: “You’d be surprised.”52Justice: “Anyway.  I like you.  Have some hearts.  I hope you come around to Netflix and grill with me sometime.  Sincerely, and it will be fun, we can learn how to cook together.”

Deedee: “That’s actually very sweet of you.  I think I would like to take you up on that offer.”51Justice: “Also I think I should apologize for my brash and silly grandpa.  Sometimes he can be a bit energetic.”

Happiness: “Can’t wait to get my muscles back!  Gonna be thicc for like, a week!  Gotta feel the burn I mastered ages ago and never picked back up!”53Meanwhile, about a block from the house, someone gave me a notification that they started a career in photography… in this weather and in this lighting, I can’t say it’s going to be a successful career start…54Hetal: “Eh.  Photography isn’t real art anyway.  It’s just a nice profitable scam I can sell to the Louvre or whatever that shit is.  Just send them my foggy black nature shots and call it art.  Easy fifty grand per photo probably.”

Oh, an Evil jackpot I have landed on here.
55Hysteria: *Flies over at breakneck speeds for an introduction* “FUCK she’s like a full head shorter than I am.”

Hetal: “I sure hope I don’t fail the ninth grade again this year.”

No problem.  No rush.  We got plenty of time to build at least a solid friendship.
56Hetal: “Join me, stranger.  Let us have a nice lunch that I may or may not have poisoned myself.”

Hysteria: “A chance to eat a poisoned burger?!  I woman after my own heart!”
57Hysteria: “… I just sat down in a fucking water puddle didn’t I.”

Hetal: “Isn’t that cold, horrid feeling just the best?  Gloomy, miserable nights like this are the best to have a picnic in.”58Well, at least for Hysteria, picking her future mate wasn’t hard at all.  Hetal is a must have for the Fallens.

Hysteria: “And with her black magic and all things gloomy, we will rule this town with an iron fist!”

Hetal: “And iron wrists!  I hope.  Since I just destroyed both of mine just now.  Hurts like a bitch.”


Face Off



I DIDN’T REALLY PLAN FOR THAT2The hospital has a shit care plan so Agony wakes up post-surgery in the rain on a hard park bench.

???: “Yeah, but I woke up on my bench first.”3???: “Wake up you insect, and witness my perfection.”

Agony: “Mmmzzzz, wuah… wazzat?  Tommy Wiseau is that your voice?”4Hysteria: “(You dumb block of rank cheese, no), it’s me, your replacement and the new offical heiress to the Fallen dynasty!  The new Agony, and you… you’re now whatever that hobo in the scrubs made.”5HHHHHHHHH TOO CLOSE IN

WHAT DID THOSE PEOPLE DO TO YOU6Agony: “My… my nose!  My lips… what did you tell them to do to my face?!”

Hysteria: “Just a fairly easy transplant from you to myself.  The dude doing the surgery then found whatever he had lying around to stitch up your holes.  I’m pretty sure your nose used to be an old toe.”7Agony: “WHY of all things, steal parts of my face?!  The vast majority of our faces were the SAME!  I think the only things you really took were my ears, lips, and boobs!  What is the point of all that?!”

Hysteria: “I needed perfection!  I need to be able to walk into the house without those other clowns realizing that the real Agony is gone and I’m an imposter!  There is no room for flaw!”

Agony: “Oh good luck getting past them like that!  The doctors clearly couldn’t transfer my fashion sense so what are they gonna say when you walk in with missing textures?”

8Hysteria: “You think they’d even notice that?  They’re dumb video game characters that would rather stand in one spot for 7 hours then pass out rather than walk up a flight of stairs to their bedroom, you really think they can see a difference between blue and purple?  This is nothing.”

Agony: “You… you really are psychotic… to break the fourth wall like that… that’s just horrible.”9Agony: “It won’t last!  They aren’t THAT stupid!  They will see past it all eventually, you can’t get down all my traits and quirks, and look!  You can’t even control my face for more than four minutes!  You’ve already busted my lower lip!”

Hysteria: “AW, FHUR FHAWKS SAKE! ‘OW DO YOU TALK WIFH DISS AH’LLOON AH’ YOUR AH’CE!!”10Hysteria: “‘Ou wait right here, an’ whe’ I geh ‘ack h’rom ge’ing a new collegen s’ot, ‘ou ‘etter ‘e gone!”

Agony: “Bitch try me.”

11Hysteria: “Listen, if I so much as see you in my houh’e e’h again I will sh’trangle you in ‘ront of de ‘amily and clan’g you as an e’r crone created by dat stu’id Secksie ro’ot frong down de street.”

Agony: “English bitch can you speak it!”12Hysteria: “Now that that has been fixed.  Begone from me.  I never want to see you around me, my legacy or my property ever again.  As I said, I will murder you and make you look like a new busted bone maid if you wander into the same room with me ever again.”

Agony: “That’s so evil! You can’t get away with it, they’ll find out!  Justice will SURELY see through it!  She’s a cop now, she will punish you! Just how can you do this to your own sister! “13Hysteria: “Very easily when I was forced away and had nothing to do with any of you for my entire life.  Goodbye Agony.  It was shit knowing you.”14Agony: “How could she do this to me… she took everything!  My life… my family… even my most precious possessions, my boobs!”15Agony: “I have never been so disgraced in my life, and so furious and heartbroken and angry and sad… where do I go from here!”16Bonus.


Jarrett: “What in the FUCK ARE YOU”17So far the rest of the family is oblivous, WHAT A SURPRISE.  Happiness was invited to his daughter’s holloween party, which is scary on its own not loading like this.

Charity: “There’s nothing scary, its decorated!  The theme is grey.  It matches my holloween outfit:  Grey.”

Happiness: “I guess I’m just happy you found a house to live in.”18Happiness: “My holloween outfit is nothing too adventurous but it kinda matches my best bro, whom I can sense from here.”19Jaime: “I like hiding away from the rest of the party and feeling up on my own ass.  This is how I spend my time these days.”20Jaime: “Don’t tell me you came all the way in here with social intentions just to cancel and stare at me.  That’s so lame.”

Happiness: “My actions are severely limited.  I just really wanted to at least see you again dude.  It’s been a while.”

Jaime: “Are we even friends anymore.”

21Ariel: “There is something… wrong with this one.  I don’t recognize it.  It’s not Agony, and it possesses a great amount of evil within it.”

Hysteria: “If it weren’t just a cat no one even pays attention to I would be concerned.  So get lost.  There’s nothing wrong with me.  It’s just I, Agony.  Now move along and go lick your anus or whatever you do around here.”22Ariel: “Yeah, Agony.  Because that’s exactly how Agony sounds and acts and drinks out of her mug.”

Hysteria: “What do you mean.  I am doing nothing wrong.  Sip sip.  Mmm.  Kool-aid or whatever.  *lip falls off in the cup*  ‘Uckin ‘hit not dis ‘hit again”23Agony: “That bitch thinks she can ban me from my own house.  I lived here before mom ever decided to crank her unwanted ass out!  I’m still on this family roster and I would LOVE to see her try to force me out of this property!”

Baal: “Hi Agony”

Agony: “Not right now you little shit, where’s the bookcase and the wall art?!”24Agony: “Actually… where is anything?  Where is everyone?  Hello, is anyone in here?”

Justice: “Hello, how can I help you today?”25Agony: “Oh thank god, Justice!  Someone with some sense!  I have to explain everything to you!  There’s an imposter amongst us, she came from-”
26Justice: “I hate to interrupt you, strange person, but we are in the process of packing all our belongings.”

Agony: “Strange person?!  Oh please don’t tell me Hysteria was right and you can’t recognize me!  Please Justice!  You have to listen to me, it’s of upmost importan-“27Agony: “What… What the fuck… where did the house go?  Where did anything here go??”28Justice: “I told you.  We are packing our belongings.  We plan on moving and broadening our horizons in a new town.  You are free to come with us and save yourself from this town’s destruction if you want to.”


Bottle from like three gens ago: “Please end my existance.”29So in finally leaving this gear grinding town, I packed the family and packed the townies that I wanted to save.  In that process though, apparently someone in the Arwing family is a fucking.  WEREWOLF.  And I can’t pack them up because lycanism is too FUCKING CONFUSING FOR THE GAME ALGEHWIAOGKDJSAL30PRAY TELL, GAME, WHO HERE LOOKS LIKE A WEREWOLF

Game, in tears: “I… I don’t… I don’t know what they are at all!”

31Is it you, Cruelty?  Are you the werewolf?


Arwing: “My diet is working!  I’m about ready for my summer beach vacation :)”

I’m proud of you I think.
32Cruelty: “Aw, FUCK.  It’s walking like a damn zombie now!  Please don’t pack me with these losers, let me die in this horrible town!!”


Tyrone: “FEAR ME I’M A REPUBLICAN VOTER”34So it turns out Tyrone IS the mystery werewolf, along with being a broken zombie apparently.  That only turns into a proper zomwolf right before bed?  I don’t even know anymore.

Tyrone: *eyes bleed out right before a good night sleep*35Anyway, for some reason I can’t just reset him out of that state in order to pack him up, not even if I restart the whole town, so I’m forced to wait until the morning to save them and put them in the library, so the family has to wait.


Peace: “While I find Wrath is overreacting for the most part, it is cold out here.  Can someone unpack some mittens if I’m to stand out here for the remainder of the night?”36Justice ended up taking them to the salon to stay until morning.  Listening to them gripe is just sad.

Peace: “Now this is what I call shelter.  I really like our temporary new house.”

Serenity: “I still exist!”37In the meantime I’ll give the heiresses their legacy tattoos.  Family tradition and all.

Justice: “I may not be scared of needles, but I am afraid of the dark!  Hold me Agony!  I don’t like being alone in here!”

Hysteria: “If you even so much as fucking touch me I will rip your fingernails out one by one and put them in your eyelids.”38Justice: “What in all that is good is wrong with you, Agony?!  That wasn’t something you would normally say…”

Hysteria: “Oh shit sorry, I meant, um, beep beep.  I think the dark is swaggy.  Tattoo me and what all meanwhile I’ll jack it to that car photo on the wall because I think vehicles are my friends.”
39Justice: “I don’t know… something is off with Agony… I think a brainworm may have gotten into her head or something?”

Hysteria: “Behold.  My cool tits.  The only thing I love more than cars.  They lactate and everything!”40Meanwhile, the real Agony is still moping around.

Agony: “Can’t I just get an optical illusion tattooed on my face to give me the appearance that I still have a nose?  Even if its just that, please, I hate this raspy whistle it makes whenever I breath in!”

41For all their whining and complaining, the Old Folks Club still slept out in the cold rain on benches.  I guess if it keeps them quiet.42Justice: “I incorporated all my artistic license into this.  I know you asked for the devil wings, but I think these will make you look more… friendly.  The heart I took special liberty in to express my love for you.”

Hysteria: “That’s it.  Give me your fingernails.”43Peace: “Well, morning is here, father.  And I think that hobgoblin family has gone back to normal and been packed in the boxes.  Shall we make our leave and find a new town to make our lives in?”

Happiness: “Yeah!  Let’s bounce before its too late.”44And with that, we leave our long beloved Hidden Springs, that cradled our legacy from the beginning.  As it creaks down to it’s now gloomy and creaky current state, the Fallens bid it farewell as they travel…