Genetic Explosions

1Of course she is.2Does this look like the military school I sent you too, you little shit?! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY YARD AND OUT OF MY LIFE, JEEZ3Wrath: *Mourns over all the sexist jokes that could have been*

To recap, last time we had little Hysteria grow up into a colossal disappointment, as I am growing accustomed to, coming from the evil side of the family and all.  But she was so much of a genetic fuck up that Jada up and died of shock, ending any future children Wrath was going to have, because the game’s just too fucking slow for her to start over.

Then after some series of shitty events, the game shut down, I shut down, and I only bothered to try again when my internet died last week.
4Peace: “Dad I’m so proud of you.  Napping on the sofa instead of passing out on the floor like a common pleb.  For that I reward you with a little beta wave pick-me-up.”

In the future I might invest in a Motive Mobile, but I know no one in the house would even use it.  They won’t even use the cars in their inventory, they keep calling taxis.  But it would be nice for future mass motive failures.5Peace: “I got invited to a party of some sorts.  I invited my cousin along for the ride.”

Wrath: “Keep telling yourself that, fucko.  I invited myself because I need someone to try my new dildo joke on.”
6Oh.  I see it’s this house.

Jaime: “I am now aware that I should have read the invite a little closer.”7Jaime: “Welp.  No way in hell I’m doing this.  Bye.”

Way to leave us to suffer all on our own the second you get here, Jaime.8Peace: “AAAAAAAHHHHHG!  Oh sorry I didn’t mean to scream like a little girl.  I just didn’t think Jaime was telling the truth about the weirdness that was in here.”

Don’t think he has place to judge, seeing as the man gave birth to a green space baby.9Upstairs I see Betsy and Nascar are trapped also invited guests of the Florida Men party.

Nascar: “I wish I took the same door Jaime did when he ran out of the house.  I thought the stairs going to the second floor was a back exit, and Lord have I never been so wrong in my entire life.”10Peace: “If I just close my eyes, and pretend I’m at a family reunion, I can almost block out the sound of constant teeth grinding they are making.”

Wrath: “What’s the difference between a dild-oooh, you know what, I don’t think I want to tell my jokes to these people…”12Arwing: “I found a friend upstairs everyone!  I have absorbed her into my body now, and we are going to be forever one from here on out…”

Betsy: “Please Nascar… Kill me…”

Nascar: “Who’d’ve thunk upstairs would be even worse than down here.  I take what I said earlier back.  This whole house needs to be burned and salted.”13Nascar: “But I’m finally freeee!  I’m getting out of here as fastly as possible!!” *turns on feet jets and ends up going backwards*

It’s good to see that the Beast is still in the game.  I don’t even recall Nascar having it.

Arwing: “No, come back, and join us!”14Arwing: “I SAID COME BACK SEXY METAL HUSBAND”

*tongue flapping in the wind*

Now isn’t that a sight.15I’ll talk shit all I want about Arwing, but the fact that she can keep her pants up over her asscrack (albeit barely) while bent over that far is admirable to say the least.  I wish I knew her secrets.16Thankfully I was taken away from the party when Cruelty returned from whatever boarding school I shipped her off to, and dumped off on the street corner the game keeps dumping them off at.  Welcome back, Cruelty.  You will not be returning home from here.

Cruelty: “Then… where the hell am I going to live.”

I have chosen a perfect home for a dirty little clone such as yourself.17Arwing: “The door brings sacrifices.”

Cruelty: “There is NOTHING I did in life that merits this kind of punishment!!”

Aww, look, Arwing bred.  I look forward to this child exploding on me.18Oh no, that’s not who she was initially set up with…

Florida Man: “Can I help I found my grandson’s baby mama so damn irresistible?  The bear noises she made in the bedroom got me rock hard.”

19Wrath: “Days like this make me miss Jada so much.  She would make merciless fun of that child for being such a failure.”

Glad to see the house hasn’t changed.
21Happiness: “I can’t believe that I made this chair all on my own.  Amazing.  Who knew we all had some free will inside of us all along.”

The house does seem to have a bit more motivation that it used to do.  Especially after Marlena died.  They’re still a little lame, but for some bit, they are more active.

22Don’t you even fucking think about it.23*Enters a cryogenic state*

I’m so glad you’re not heiress, Serenity.24Also it’s nice to see I’m not the only one suffering with like genetics in this town.  All these Fancy Secksie three gen clones make me feel a little better about myself.

Justine: “How am I supposed to differentiate any of these people in this vanilla white ass crowd”

Clone 1: “Sigh, fine, I’ll invest in some glasses and a mustache.”25Vanessa: “I’m the only teacher in the school at the moment because the children would suck the life out of the rest of the fleshies.”

Justine: “Glasses and a mustache?!  What makes you think that’s gonna make a difference?  You still gonna be the same basic first born carbon copy of the last remnants of a forgotten family dynasty, glasses isn’t going to help that.”

Copy: “…Oh.”

Serenity: *Hits snooze*26Brave: “Oh snap crackle and pop!  Who died in the hallway now?!”

Peace: “I’m pretty sure that that is Jada’s corpse in that box, but granted it’s probably mother, since I don’t recall her ever being moved since Justice’s birthday party.”27Serenity: “Which is all well and done, because it is now my birthday!”

Try not to fall asleep on the cake.28Happiness: “Please don’t be sad over the death of the Jada lady, my precious grandchild.  She was a regret that I’m sure Wrath realizes at this point.  And besides, look at me going out of my way to actually socialize with you,  much less console you.  That’s got to mean something to you right?”

Justice: “Why are you touching me with your creepy broken wrists”29Wrath: *Evil maniac giggling*

Oh no, I already know where this is going.30Peace: “WHHHHHHYYYYYY?!!!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO MEEEE!”

Foreground Alien Snowman: *Pats the crotch*

31Peace: “No please, not the memories, oh sob, I still miss my sweet child so much”

Alien: “Oh man really, is he actually crying?  Wow ok fine, I won’t pat the crotch.” *Pats the ass*
32Justice: “So, uh, why are you still a child if we had a birthday for you like last night or something?”

Serenity: “Oh that’s easy.  I keep crashing the game while blowing out the candles, so I will be eternally young forever I suppose.”

Justice: “Oh ok.  Cool I guess.”

Yayyyyy, one of those game sessions THAT’S WHAT I NEEDED33Happiness: “I set up a new stage for my new show to entice new watchers.  The theme is Any Where But Here.  Because that’s where I’d rather be right now.”34Pregnant Townie: “I don’t mean to whore the attention away from this ghoul and his show, but I REQUIRE ATTENTION PLS”

Happiness: “Will I NEVER get anybody to watch my shows?!”35*Manages to hold on to a couple of viewers by screaming and crying his eyes out into the microphone*

Lady Onlooker: “Eh, well you’ve seen one pregnant lady in public you’ve seen them all.”

Proprietor: “Yeah lady, you’re scaring off our money with your damn baby, go squat him out elsewhere.”

Prego: “HMPH, fine, I’ll find another lot that will give me the attention I so desperately need!  Bye losers!”36Oh shit I almost forgot this little monster was even still in the house.  Thank you.  Get the hell out of here.

Cynthia: “Ugh finally, now I can finally relax and sleep in peace.  I’m so stressed out and wound up from her being in this house that I’m pretty sure I’m suffering a pulled tendon.”

Pretty sure you’ve pulled more than a tendon.37And it was here, post Serenity’s birthday, that my game completely shut this town down, and I vanished for 8 months to do anything else.  Each time her little teenage ass even so much as came in contact with air, the game died.  I even tried to pack the family up and force them to move into a new town for a whole new start, but the game was like NO

So now we’re back from outer space and back in business I think maybe.  I have finally been allowed back in this town on parole, and even though the computer deleted HALF OF THE FUN LITTLE PHOTOS I TOOK BETWEEN NOW AND THE END OF THIS CHAPTER, it’s good to be back.38We start off with a non-game generated makeover for our little failure here.

Serenity: “I’m cute, so all is forgiven. I even stopped passing out so much!  I mean, you know.  After being in that bed for 8 months, I probably should.”

True.39Justice is still heiress though, well behaved and off on her own, trying to help her father locate the aliens that stole her sister.

Justice: “This monitoring device should pick up the alpha brain waves of any nearby extraterrestrial, so we should soon have a lead on who kidnapped Isabella or Iguanodon or whoever her name was.  I will aid my father on his quest to make our family whole again, but first, I got to get this device to stop picking up on all the horses in the area.”

Good kid.40On a side note, I never realized that Baal had babies with another dog!  And down the line, he became a great-grandpa!


He must be so proud!41Happiness: “And there you go, little werewolf man!  Your song-a-gram for the day, now if you don’t mind, I rather look at the Freddie Fallen nerd next to you, because apparently he’s my grandchild, and he looks like a dweeb.”42Freddie, Child of Charity no less, is actually a cutie patootie.

Happiness: “Yes, well, my genes are quite powerful, I am aware.”

Charity was mostly Marlena, but whatever floats his boat.
43Happiness: “This grandchild I don’t really want to claim, don’t make me do it.”

Loyalty I had more faith in than Charity, but apparently she’s not faired well on her breeding path, but maybe I’m just being harsh, compared to Freddie.43Speaking of genes, this kid might be a future parent to a generation, so let’s see what kind of child Jodi’s bringing into the household for a visit!44Ice Jaime: “Alright you guys, we have some ground rules in this house you must abide if you are to come into this house.  First rule, wipe your feet at the door.  Second of all, wipe your feet before entering the kitchen.  Third, wipe feet before jumping on trampoline, fourth, wipe ass after sitting on toilet, fifth-”

Jodi: “Why is an inanimate block of ice talking to me”

Oh no, is that yellow on orange I see there…45Rodrigo: “Mommy says I’m her little ray of sunshine.”

Jodi: “More like my little ray of radiation, but he hears what he wants to hear.”45It’s been a while since I plopped the Florida Man in town, but I do not recall him going on the prowl and hitting it up with an older woman and spreading the sauce amongst the general population.  GRANTED that’s what he was put here for, but I didn’t think he was actually successful.46.1He IS currently dating the Arwing Monster though, as recently stated.  I don’t even know if their pregnancy is still a thing, since there were so many crashes in the past, I don’t think it even survived to our current state.  But her current child isn’t his.46.2Tyrone, apparently belongs to Jarrett, like I originally planned for.

Jarrett: *looks miserable for good reason*46.3And then we have Florida Man, his father and brother, apparently has absorbed their mother, the bucket head Florida Man, and is now the father, brother, and mother.  I don’t know what’s going on anymore.

Florida Man: “We are one, we are many”

Jarrett: “I want death.”46Rodrigo: “I thought they had a wack house, but wow.  There’s not even a full set of walls, and it has nothing but a lot of crappy 8-bit art.  I want to go home.”

Jodi: “I wish I could go home without you, but it’s snowing so badly, I’d rather not have the social workers coming to my house asking why I dumped you off in an unwalled house in the middle of the night…”

And there they stood until they got too cold and Jodi was forced to actually take her son home.47And then Tyrone exploded, and I had to go look at this mess.

Tyrone: *Tries to fly away from his icon box with his large Dumbo ears*48AGGHHHH, I mean he beautiful49Sandi: “Why the hell am I here and where the fuck are my pants”

Tyrone: *Takes the cross eyed toddler look to a whole new level*50Happiness: “Please no, don’t put me down next to this thing, I’m getting very uncomfortable”

Tyrone: *Loud vacuum noises*51Wrath: “I suppose I’ll just chunk all these rocks in here at once.  They’re all glitchy and bugging out anyhow.”52Cynthia: “That’s nice.  Do this at 4 in the morning.  We want to put up with it.”

Wrath: “Why is a woman like a busted phone jack?”

Serenity: “You know you keep this up I’m going to start passing out on the floor again.  Fair warning.”53Wrath: “What did the gay sailors say when pulling up to dock at a gay bar?  All hands on dick.”

Why would you even want to bother trying.  54Wrath: “Well first off, Jada is up and about, and I am filled with such love and adoration for my baby maker, that I wanted to rekindle the relationship and start over anew by BREAKING UP WITH YOU, BITCH.  You REALLY just died right here on the floor after finding out our children were all failures, you really left me with a pack of shit on my plate here”

Jada: “What the fuck did you want from me I was like 100 years old”

Wrath was ACTUALLY attempting to break up with Jada to become “reengaged” with her, because you know how it is.  Spouse dies, they can’t get married because some bug or some shit, they have to break up and give them the ring back, yadda yadda yadda, I’ve done this horse and buggy before.55But Jada had none of it, the second Wrath broke up with her, she poofed.  And not the stinky green cloud of ghosty vanishness, she just popped out of existence so hard that I bet you anything she won’t be back.  Hell, I bet you she’s not even in the game any more.  Gooooooo figure.

Cynthia: “Dang.  That was worth getting woken up at 4 in the morning.”

Wrath: “Hold up, hold up.  I’mma write a new epitaph on her grave…”56Wrath: “That’s better.”57But Agony tried to come back to the house, she popped up at the side of the road across town and asked for $800 to go back to school, which I clicked yes to, I wasn’t even willing to put up with her shit.

But before she poofed back into Love and Hippie Academy, I looked at her.  And I realized something.58Wrath: “Hey, you aren’t as cloney as I remember.”

Agony: “I don’t think I ever was?  I was told I was a clone of grandmother but not of you.”

Wrath: “But like, I don’t even think you’re a clone of your grandmother, you seem to have a good bit of Jada splattered all over you.”59Wrath: “If all goes well, I think you will be my heir to the throne.”

Agony: “Dammit, I knew I should have picked up the Good trait while in that stupid school.”60So I guess this is where the chapter ends.  With me realizing that Agony was probably the genetic mix I craved all along, even though I swore up and down she was just a pre-war throwback to Jealousy.  Here I have pasted a picture of her for comparison reference.

Wrath: “Don’t look her in the eyes, Agony.  She can sense your fear and failure.”

Jealousy: “No you little bitches you look me in the face, and you explain to me why my legacy is the shitpile you let it degrade to be!  EXPLAIN!!”61Uh actually lastly, here have this notification of Baal becoming a great-great grandfather!  Congradulations Baal!



In Hysterics

1 Justice: “Death is sad.”

Hold on.  Something more important is going on across town.  I need to look at this Florida spawn instead.2 Wow.  Did you try to kiss a bee, kid?

Justine: “Help me, my upper lip doesn’t really look attached.”

You’ll grow into it, probably.3 Peace: “Yeah really, no one is sad about my mother dying, I’m going to kill this lie the game says that I’m “feeling” and go back to washing the dishes, ok?”

Last chapter involved a couple of birthdays, and the most awaited death since Bella Secksie.  Marlena finally passed away after Nascar ripped her liver out through her vagina.  He will have a parade in his honor downtown every year on this day from now on.5 Also Jada wasn’t in the last chapter at all, and that’s probably why she’s been beheaded by sleep in this one.

Maybe it was best if she just stayed out of the chapters if this is all she’s gonna do.6

Peace: “-And then the evil queen perished after being dragged down the street in a spiked barrel by all the kings’ horses, the princess finally lived happily ever after.”

Serenity: “That was such a good ending to grandmother’s autobiography.”

Peace: “That was The Goose Girl, honey.  It’s a fairy tale.”

Serenity: “Close enough in all honesty.”

Since we are in the room of the deceased, where is Marlena’s loving widower.7 Happiness: “I refuse to go home because I can’t make any money there.”

You can’t make any money if you freeze to the ground either.8 Peace: “Dad, I called you home like three hours ago, where were you?”

Happiness: “Sorry but look who I brought home with me!  Jaime hasn’t been to visit in forever so he tagged along!”

Peace: “Dad he was here literally 4 hours ago.”9 Jaime: “Wow, they were right, you DID inherit that magnificent six pack from your father.”

Peace: “Please Mr. Vampire, get your fingers out of my navel.”10 That’s right, Jealousy.  You weren’t alive when we got seasons were you.  Are you, er, enjoying it so far?

Jealousy: “I just built a second igloo and am now working on my vicious snowman army.  What the hell do you think?”11 Evalin: “Haha, you are so unimportant Angela that they didn’t even bother taking a picture of you this chapter!”

Jada: “Yeah, tell her like it is, spooky ghost lady!”

Wrath: “Like grandmother like wife.  I married the right woman <3”


Peace: “I have literally just started working on the sculpture.  It’s not my fault it took you all night to make your way back here to post for me.”13 God in the distance: “I hereby declare this gay bar to be extra extra gay.”

Peace: “Wassat”

14 A blizzard rainbow!  I feel like this is super rare.  Maybe not in the sims, but maybe.15 Jaime’s statue was finished and plopped down in the front yard to welcome guests for the remainder of the winter season.

Happiness: “Apparently I’ve been standing out here since last night.  Hm.”

Not my problem.
16 I realized I never gave Wrath her family tattoo, and it’s really late in her generation to do so, but I went ahead and put it on her.  I meant to put it on Peace if he hadn’t had one yet, (he may already have one.  On his thigh??) but I got distracted and forgot to check so I’ll have to check later.17 I didn’t want to disturb this sweet family moment.

Happiness: “Marlena never wanted to do things like this with me in all the years I have known her!  This is so exciting!”

Peace: “That’s because mom’s idea of adventure and thrill is moving three spaces left into the living room maybe once a week.”18 Peace: “Officially done being a single father.  Okay Cynthia!  I’m over my mid life crisis!  We can stop pretending we signed the real divorce papers!  Cynthia?”19Peace: “There’s my darling waifu!  I’m gonna completely ignore why you are dressed like that and present with you the Flowers of Apology, in the hopes that you will forgive me and come back to me in marriage!”

Cynthia: “Oh Peace!  They are beautiful!  They make me kinda regret throwing my wedding ring into the lake!”20 Peace: “Do not worry about that dear!  Because I dove down into the bottom of the lake and risked myself to return it to you!  Because that’s how much I love you!  Also this is a family heirloom from my grandmother, and dad’d kill me if we lost it.”

Cynthia: “Well in that case, drop another $4 grand on a vow renewal ceremony and I’m all yours, Peace!”

I love it when things work out.21 I see you’re still wandering around through the woods.  Need me to call someone?  Maybe an ambulance??

Arwing: *Sorrowful moose calls*22 Arwing: “I accidentally absorbed my Rick while we were making violent love right here in the snow 😦 😦 :(”

Jesus Christ, RIP Rick.23Peace: “To celebrate our future vow renewal, we are all going on a family trip to the mountains!”

Happiness: “In the middle of the night?  In a snowstorm??  With the kids stuffed in the trunk???”

Cynthia: “It was a good idea at the time…”
24 Well at least one of the children.  Serenity would rather stare at wall than go on a family outing.

Serenity: “What can I say, the ripples in this wall art is mesmerizing!”25 Actually she’s probably better off than her sister.

Justice: “Did they really just run on ahead of me and leave me alone on the side of a cold frozen mountain in the dark?  Is this some kind of training hidden as a game because I’m not sure…”26 Cynthia: “To be honest, my husband’s too spry for his ideas of a good time and I get pretty tired during his outings most of the time.”

Peace: “OH GOD GUYS THERE’S A WATERFALL STILL FALLING OVER HERE”27Besides the waterfall, there’s a unicorn somewhere not far from where the Fallens are.  Somewhere in that rock.
28 Unicorn: “Am I dead yet?”

Considering how deeply wedged you are in that boulder, yeah, probably.29 Mad skating skills you got there, Happiness.

Happiness: “What can I say, I’m a natural pro.”
30 Justice: “Mommy, why is grandpa a cheating blur?”

Cynthia: “Because his idiot wife rubbed off on him and he ended up inheriting her crazy.”31 Peace: “If we hold hands and stay in the middle of the pond, dad will create a wind tunnel that will gently push us along and we won’t have to skate!”

Justice: “GRANDPA STOP, I’M NOT ABLE TO SKATE IN THESE WIND CONDITIONS”32 Cynthia: “What was that about a gentle breeze, Peace?!”


So much for a happy outing.33 Happiness, they left.

Happiness: “I can’t stop ;-; I’m not in control of my own free will.”
34 Happiness: “Correction.  I can’t control my own free will very well.”

Well you better learn to teleport home somehow on your own then.35 Wrath: “The only reason I invited you for my kid’s birthday party was because you saved us from Marlena stealing all of our oxygen and space.  Also because I wanted a party for my kid and I need friends.  You are the closest thing we have.”
36 Nascar: “I’m apparently the only closest thing you have to a friend.”

Wrath: “Just shut up and eat this cake when I’m done with it.”37 Heh.

Look at that.






38 Peace: “Congrats to me!  I finally finished my LTW!  Now that that’s out of the way, I can provide my services to be a better family man for my wife and daughters.”

NOT RIGHT NOW PEACE I’M FUCKING ANGRY AT GENETICS39 Wrath: “Wow doesn’t the time fly, feels just like yesterday it was Hysteria’s birthday and now it’s her birthday again!”

Nascar: “That’s illogical as it was just 3 minutes ago.”

I’m childifying her and dumping her off in boarding school!  I’m not wasting my time raising another Wrath.  JADA!  Get your ass in the photobooth and the back yard and TAKE THE PANTS OFF.  We’re starting over again!40 Jada: “NOPE.  You’ve had long enough time to scrape together your little heir out of me, and I’m not gonna stick around here to deal with anymore.  No more spaghetti children, no more boarding school, no nothing.”

REALLY41 Betsy: “Oh that’s gonna infuriate some people.”

Hysteria: “Mummy why”




43 Nascar: “Whoa, this isn’t my fault this time.”

Wrath: “CYNTHIA!  DO SOMETHING TO SAVE MY BABY MAMA”44 Wrath: “THAT DOES NOTHING FOR ME CYNTHIA”45 Hysteria: “Great party lol later”

Jada: “There goes my genetic legacy.  Sigh.”

THERE’S NOTHING IN THOSE GENETICS THAT’S YOUR LEGACY YOU EPISODE FILLER46 Serenity: “It’s ok Auntie Jada!  We will be here to mourn for you!”

Justice: “We love you!  And we will miss you taking care of us and looking out for us just like the loving mother you really were deep down inside.”

Jada: “No please, save me from them, Death.”47 Wrath: “NO Jada, please!  Stick your baby gravy in me one last time at least!”

FINE, LEAVE US JADA, LEAVE US LIKE ALL THE OTHER GOOD SIMS HAVE LEFT US BEFORE >;O48 Serenity: “Please take me with you, I’m too sad to carry on”

Justice: “Tired of you pulling this stunt, Serenity.”49 Wrath: “Haha yes, come pick up another one.  I don’t even care if you misplace this one either.”

So Hysteria’s going to boarding school too, at least until I figure out what I’m going to do.  Three “options” and all of them are clones.  By the rules, Hysteria’s instant heiress with her Evil trait, but I also barred clones from inheriting because fuck.

So now I’m thinking…50To end this chapter, here is last but not least for now:

Nascar: “HAHAHA!  Oh man!  That’s gross.”

Jaime: “No way man, get that nasty notification away from me!”


The Hero the Fallens Deserved

1 Behold the beautiful Flatwood Forest of Hidden Springs.  It’s a vacant island that doesn’t have any visitors allowed on it because if you touch the 2D trees, you get a very painful papercut.2 The town is a little boring today, so let’s go on a mountain hike up this giant rock next to the Fallen’s house.  I bet the view up there is fantastic.3 Now that we’re on the summit look at that foggy view.  Sad that such a lovely emerald land has so much smog pollution in the far distance.  At least Hidden Springs can keep its area clean.4 The back of the mountain is a little more ominous.  The highway leads nowhere.  Don’t plan any trips outside of town, it’s almost like the FHA said, “here’s the end of the road, go get lost in the wilderness, get eaten by a bear or something.  Fuck you and your highway taxes.”5 Last chapter, Peace divorced his wife to appease the aliens, and started looking through a telescope to find him.  One logic point later, he’d rather spend money on a lab table and make potions, though.

Wrath: “What does the nerd boy think he’s doing now?  Trying to chemical your way to getting your daughter back?  Hallucinations aren’t the same thing, loser.”6

Wrath: “Hey, don’t you ignore me when I’m making a good jab at you, Peace!  You aren’t allowed to get the better of me just by ignoring me!”7 Wrath: “Whatever.  I’ll just ignore you ignoring me.  See how you like it.”8 Wrath: “Don’t you ignore me ignoring you ignore me!  With you’re one missing texture bald spot in the back of your sad low resolution haircut.  You want to try to show me up in potion making, then so be it!”9 Wrath: “You want a potions competition, you HAVE one massive beatdown coming up!”

Then she forced Jada to carry her alchemy set down from upstairs because forcing a pregnant woman to carry a heavy table makes their children born as genetic clones of their parents.10 Wrath: “And what do you think of THAT?  Perfectly blended bee hive in an old Pepsi bottle.  You can take your science and shove it up your colon, Peace.”11 Peace: “I did it!  It took about 6 hours, I’m about to wee and pass out, but I think I have made a concoction of stinky.  It will only be good to further educate myself on how to make better potions.”

Wrath: “You little shit, not just how you DARE to continue to ignore how better I am at this than you, but spend 80 fucking years mixing sulfur into sewage water and calling it a potion!”12 Wrath: “Fifty bees for your absolute bullshit!”

Peace: “NO PLEASE!  DAD!  GET YOUR MUSIC COLLECTION OUT AND TRY TO SERENADE THESE BEES INTO CALMING DOWN AND BEING NICE!  I DON’T HAVE THE COMPLEXION FOR WELTS!”13 Wrath: “Nerd.  Now that he’s finally gone, I can stand out here and calmly enjoy nature, with that, horrid, wannabe alchemy, lab, table, thing…”14 Wrath: “This thing looks stupid anyway, might as well get a closer look at it’s stupid stupidness.”

You can’t hide your wishes from me, Wrath.15 Wrath: “Ooooh wow-oh!  I created a mood-enhancer!  And I created it so much faster than Peace’s shitty potion!  I’m pretty good at this!”16 Wrath: “Yeah but this science stuff is still wack.  Whatever.”

Whatever you say.17 Cynthia: “Maybe if I dig long enough, I can find a large enough diamond that will pay a way for me to take all my children and go far far away, away from all men, for the rest of my life.”

If only it were so, dear.
18 Cynthia: “Sitting on my leg in the sand box has caused it to fall asleep, but there is some good news!  It’s my birthday!”19 Baal: “I have come to show that I care.”

Cynthia: “That’s better than being alone.”20 Holy shit they are civil to each other.

Wrath: “I forgot she was even alive.”

Marlena: “I forgot I was even alive.”
21 Wrath: “For being alive, two bees.”


Wrath: “They brought their own friends over.”22 Wrath: “All the bees musta’ fucked you up real bad this time Marlena.  You turned into an old version of what’s her face.  Peace’s wife.  Uuuuh, Cynthia.”

Cynthia: “That’s because it is ME, Cynthia, you dill pickle.”23Marlena: “I was on my way to get rid of all Wrath’s bees. but I only made it halfway before I decided to stand here in this one spot for 3 hours.”

Serenity: “Come on grandma.  Let’s go inside before frostbite finishes off what’s left of your legs.”
24 They were actually both just standing there being dumbasses, so I made them help Wrath build an igloo so she’d get it over with before she ends up pissing herself with her pregnancy bladder.

Marlena: “Actually I think I’m just gonna stand here and supervise Serenity on her block making skills.  I supervise better than anything else.”

Wrath: “Of course you do.”
25 Wrath: “Yay!  I get to use 3.14 more bees today!”


26 Wrath: “Ah yes.  The bees were good this year.  A wonderful harvest of honey and violence towards you.  What do you think about that, Marlena?”

Marlena: “I used to pray you’d learn to love one day and find forgiveness but now I’d really wish you’d fall off a fjord.”27

I haven’t watched one of Happiness’ shows in forever.  Luckily the game still makes him go to those things, but I don’t think he goes through with shows anymore unless I watch him at least start it.  I watched him set up this time because of the five people here that bothered to show up.  What a massive turnout!

Happiness: *Fake moonwalks*
28 Lisa: “Oh wow hot stuff!  Yes, I’d let you autograph my tits any day!”

Happiness: “Awww yeah, come give me a hug, baby!”

Your wife isn’t dead yet, Happiness.29 Holy shit, wait a tid bit.

That’s a 5-figure paycheck right there!  I’m gonna have to watch you do your shows more often.30 Good to see you’re still chugging down bloody pipes, Nascar.

Nascar:  “I have access to a lot of them now that I’m in politics.”31 Nascar: “Now I have to watch it and see if it goes all the way down…”

I think I’ve stayed way too long at the show tonight.32 Wrath: “What does a woman and a screen door have in common?  The more you bang them, the looser they get.”

That joke was so bad, the textures left.33 Wrath: “I just wanted to watch the cooking channel :)”

It didn’t want you watching it.34 Wrath: “There.  I fixed it.”

You made it WORSE.35 Wrath: “Fixing the television made me want to fix other things now!  Me and the toilet are gonna smash!”

Please don’t, we finally got it fixed since Cruelty left.36 Wrath: “Too much smashing!  The hammering sensation has scared my fetus and it’s trying to run away.”

Took it long enough.
37Btw you still have a lumpy boob, Wrath.  Really, you should get that checked out.  Or at least buy a better bra.
38 Wrath: “I hold this child up with such high regard because it’s probably the last hope I have for this line.”

Hysteria is her name.  Three girls in a row and no sons, I’m starting to think this will end up as a matriarch line.  She likes roots music, chili con carne, and hot pink.  She’s a loner virtuoso, not winning traits, but I’m really just caring to see her toddler stage already.39 Her bed room is Betel’s old storage room because I can’t care enough right now to give her a full nursery.

Betel’s forgotten ghost: “Well why don’t you just dump her damn crib in Cruelty’s and Agony’s old room!  You aren’t even using that anymore!”

Meeehhh, that’s across the hall, I don’t feel like scrolling over to it.40 Hey look at what I found prancing through the forest at 3 in the morning.

Arwing: “Call the AARP, I’m lost.”41 Rick: “Please.  Don’t let this happen to me.  I’m just standing here.”

Arwing: *Extends tongue for maximum frenching*

Run, Rick.
42 Peace: “I uh, I’m giving up on my fool plan to save my baby.  It’s not working.  So I hope Cynthia can accept my invite to go watch some stars tonight to repair our relationship.”

You’re a master of marriage, Peace.43 Much like your father, what the shit, Happiness.

Happiness: “I think I’m finally tired of the horrid way she’s raised my family, gosh darn it!  Had I known she’d be such a cruddy wife, I wouldn’t have spent so many chapters stealing her away from Envy!  Also, I’d like to tap it with the Lisa woman, so yeah44 Well damn.  45Alien Chick’s Whose Name I Don’t Remember So Honestly Tt Would Be Easier On Me If Aliens Were Given Some Sort Of Anglicized Names For My Weak Little Earthling Speaking Brain To Remember Because I Can’t: “We did get your repeal letter in the mail asking to open your custody case back up, Peace.  It was denied for the 800th time, stop trying to contact us.”

Peace: “You come in here, on the day of my daughter’s birthday, while I hold a hammer and chisel in my hands”46 Brave: “Why would you keep inviting her in here then?”

Peace: “I don’t know a lot of people, I needed guests for my party.  Hey Briana, haven’t seen you in months and months!  How have you been doing.”

Betsy: “I’m Betsy… Briana’s my sister, remember.”

Peace: “Didn’t you just hear me, it’s been months and months.”47 Charity: “Congradulations on the birthday of my neice!  To commemorate, I brought a loaf of, um, something, time to dig in!”

Nascar: “And I brought the crushed up remains of whatever I found in the grinder at work.  Mostly meat.  Not sure of what, but it’s edible probably.”48 Loaf: “No mommy don’t put me down on the nasty table!  You can’t put me down, I refuse to let go!”

Jamie: “What”
49 It took two decades for Peace to get Justice for her birthday, so by the time he located her, the guests had mostly started their way back home.

I’ll give them the slip this time.  There’s a blizzard going on outside, no one wants to stand in that for a baby’s birthday.50 Briana: “I didn’t want to stand inside of Orange!Shrek either.  I have a hundred other things I’d rather do.”

Florida Man: “I’m enjoying myself, honestly.”51Peace: “It’s ok baby, I still love you and care.”

Jamie: “I’m enjoying the party from the living room, woo.”
52 Marlena: “What… what are you doing!  You’ve ripped out my liver!  I needed that to live!”


NASCAR THANK YOU SO MUCH53 Marlena: “WHOA, you’re… traveling a little far down don’t you think?!”54 Marlena: “WhoooOOAAAAaaah, only my husband and gyno should be touching on that!!”

NASCAR, no wait don’t do that ew55 Wrath: “Excuse me, Pastey.  I was promised front row center to this event for years now.  Move.”

Nascar: “Why did I have to be frozen to this exact spot at this exact time.”56 Cynthia: “Happy birthday baby!  The universe has given you the greatest birthday present ever!  The death of your crappy grandmother!”

Peace: “I couldn’t think of a better present.”57 Wrath: “This isn’t fair, I wanted to be the one that killed her.”

Nascar: “I’m the hero the Fallens deserved, but not the one they needed.”

Jaime: “No, trust me when I say we needed you sooner.”58 Wrath: “Really I don’t care.  I’d rather watch the spaghetti child grow up now.”

Fair enough.  Don’t RIP Marlena.  Don’t come back to visit.  I don’t need a ghost standing all night in the hallway for the rest of eternity.59 Peace: “Ah finally.  Now we can all sit and eat at the dinner table like a family without mom wheezing in the background near the bathroom.”

Cynthia: “It is really nice, even though we are missing a member of our family sitting here right now.  I wonder where she is.”

Peace: “;-; she’s in spac-”

Cynthia: “NOT THE ALIEN CHILD, PEACE.”60Serenity: “I don’t know why I’m out where I am at the moment, but I better hurry home before the road completely severs itself from the world and falls into the void.”

Gremlins Don’t go to Boarding School

1Baal: “Behold, everyone.  It is I, Baal, and my magic ball friend, Ball, who has been magically levitating here for six months straight!  Isn’t nature amazing.”

Look at what’s back after a 6 month hiatus!  I didn’t really have a solid reason as to why I took such a long break with the FISBI this go around.  I initially thought that I could go ahead and focus all my attention on the other legacy, finish the Rainbowcy up real quick and then get on with this one without having to juggle them, but after all the real life shit that stopped me from wanting to play altogether for a while, that didn’t get done either.  So so much for that.  I could say I hope there are no more future hiatuses, but really, at this point, there’s probably no way this is going to be the last one.  I’m sorry that this is taking so long and I just as to just bear with me as we crank this thing towards our 10 gen goal.

We shall start with a small treat to get this chapter underway.  Around December I finally had someone show me how to jack around with the CAS settings in Master Controller.  You know, I’m FINALLY getting around to learning what all MC can do and all.  After 3 or so years, you know.  So I thought what better way to get some fucked up genetics in this town by fucking up some genetics.  So one late night CAS trip and I added a beautiful new resident to live in Hidden Springs.2She’s the newest green skinned resident to live in Hidden Springs, after previously spending all her life living under a busted cooling tower.  Halfway through her construction, I thought her head looked a bit like an Arwing from Star Fox, and it kinda stuck, so since I never really gave her a name, I’ve just been calling her the Arwing monster.

The Arwing monster: *High pitched shrill screaming* 8U3 She was plopped right down into the house of the Florida Men, where she will marry Jarrett when he comes of age, and birth their vastly detailed and extraordinary future children.

Jarrett: “I’m uncomfortable with this forced and bullshit marriage”

The Arwing Monster: “Shuddup ‘n get in my bed bb”4Random Werewolf named Angela I think: “What the holy hell am I looking at”

TAM: *gasp* “U R bootyful.” :0

5 TAM: “Gimme a kissu :y”

Back the camera up, please.6 Angela: *Gets her licky on some titty*

TAM: “Yeah this is the type of attention I signed up for”

I don’t feel safe leaving her unsupervised.7Angela: “Yeah who’s a bad girl it’s meeeee”

TAM: “Plbbbbbbt”

Florida Man: “What the fuck did I walk in on happening on my newly shampooed carpet”
8 Florida Man: “Actually, you are kinda cute!  I always wanted a pet frog!  I think I’ll name you Cassidy, and keep you in the terrarium upstairs.”


Ok, I’m wishing her the best of luck, and leaving the house now.

With that, the creation and installation of the Arwing monster was the last thing I did back in January, so we’re really getting back to some relatively new Fallen activity in the household.9 We start off with the actual house still sleeping and not getting the memo that the game is back on.

Textures:  *Is hibernating*

Wrath: “They’ve been snoozing for 6 months, do you really think they are going to wake up on a dime?!”

Apparently everything in the house looks sleepy, not just the sims.10 Wrath: “Ok before I start with the great joke about stuffing old people through a pencil sharpener, I’m calling to send my shitty teenage clone child to your boarding school.  I don’t actually wish it, but I’m sick of her loitering around my house breaking all my bathroom appliances, and we just got back from a 6th month vacation.  I am not dealing with this first thing off the bat.”

And with that there goes Cruelty.  Get the hell out of here.11 I SAID GO

Cruelty: “Haha, my mother’s a world class embarrassment.”

Granted it’s almost August and she’s still wearing her Halloween costume, but that’s really my fault I suppose.12 And I don’t know when or why I deleted the bottom rooms of the house (or even if it was I that did so), but WHY DID I DO THAT13 I didn’t really feel like rebuilding a room, so I made it an outside nook for Betel, if I ever allow her to come back.14 Wrath: “How do you stop a baby from drowning?  You take your foot off the back of it’s head!”

Jada: “I’m going to ignore your desperate attempts to get me to impregnate you right now to point out how lumpy your right booby is.  Get that checked out and then come talk to me again.”15 Wrath: “Aw yeah, come in here and put that wienie in my hole”

Jada: “I’m about to take this wienie off and just beat you to death with it.”16 Come on, mama needs a new genetically mixed child!17 Wrath: “I shall now write a song and serenade to my favorite bush in the whole wide world.  Not yours Jada move the fuck out of the way.  This is for you jelly belly shrub.”

Jada: “Dammit, I didn’t get to the guitar in time.  I was going to smash it before she started being an embarrassment :(“18 Cynthia: *Discusses important political matters with the dog out in the middle of a storm*

Baal: “I just wanted to play with my toy, is that too much to ask?”19 Cynthia: “Why in heaven’s name is there a soggy hot dog taking care of my baby?”

Jada: “Because the mother’s too busy being doped up acting, trying to hold a discussion with an animal out in the rain.  Don’t shit talk me while I’M taking care of your kid, k?”20 Peace: “I still think about you all the time my sweet unnamed child…”

Cynthia: “If you want to have woohoo with me, get in here already and stop dinking around out there.”21 More hunky dooby.  The easy access to pictures is a great cover for the REAL reason we got a photobooth on the lot.22 Wrath: “What does the lesbian vampire say to the other?  “Same time next month.””

Yes, lovely, Wrath.  Let’s let the baby play bouncy horse near the row of bee houses.

Wrath: “No one in this family cares.  Look at the father.  He doesn’t give a shit.”

Peace: “Once I’m done with this painting, I’ll go over there and save my child.  I need to mix my greens better first though…”
25 Wrath: “Yesss, you little shart.  Lead the bees to victory.”

Justice: “I shall be the leader this bee villa needs to succeed!”

Wrath: “When I have kids, I’m going to be a great mother.”

Cynthia: “What the…”26 Good parenting skills, Wrath.

Justice: “I think I swallowed one.”27 Jesus, WHY are you still here in the house?!  We sent you away to boarding school two nights ago!

Cruelty: “As the new bathroom goblin, I require to remain present in the bathroom at all times.”


Serenity: “Really dad?  That’s immature.”29 Serenity: “MOOOOM!  Dad’s being inappropriate!”

Peace: “Don’t run off and tell on me!  It was an accidental twisting of the nipple!  This bathroom wasn’t made for two people to fit and I didn’t know you were in here!!”30 Cynthia: “This is just swell.  I’m lost in the woods again, and this time, I don’t think I can escape this desolate and dreary land.”31 Cynthia: “Oh wait, it’s just the backdrop from the Halloween party, since someone hasn’t spent the last half year cleaning this up like they were supposed to.”

Cruelty: “I don’t do fuckin’ chores around here, piss off.”32Serenity: “He followed me in here momma… help… me…”

Cynthia: “Stop scaring our child with threats of nipple twisting.  That’s illegal in most states I think.”

Peace: “It was an ACCIDENT, I swear!”33 And then Peace lost his fucking mind.

Peace: “Does this look like the face of a man that gives a rootin’ tootin’.”34 Peace: “But no wait listen, it’s gonna be a temporary break up I promise!  See, if I appear as a single father to the aliens, they will take pity on me and return Ivalice or Iguana or Iggy Azalea to us, whatever her name was.  And we can get remarried and be a whole big happy family again, Cynthia!”

Serenity: “Nope, gonna go press my face against this dimension warping radio and block out the sad stupid stuff I am hearing.”35 Cynthia: “Why my husband being so stupid.”

Cruelty: “Yesssss, domestic disturbances.  I get off on this kinda stuff.”

Why don’t you GO TO BOARDING SCHOOL ALREADY36 Cruelty: “Haha, you’re getting dumped harder than you were by your first husband!”

Peace: “Stop cruelly mocking her, Cruelty!  But yeah, Cynthia, please sign the divorce papers, ASAP so I can turn them into the Alien Childcare and Foreign Relations Department in the morning.”37 Cynthia: “Why can’t he understand that that baby doesn’t even exist anymore…”

Cruelty: “Now I’m so glad I skipped out of going to an expensive boarding school for this!”38 Peace: “I must at least try to get my daughter back!  I can’t go on my whole life knowing there is a child out there without her parents, me and you!  So I must dump you to maybe try to get her back!  It’s a flawless plan!”

Cynthia: “Can’t you just be happy with the daughters you got??”39 Serenity: *Silently sobs now that she has to pick a parent and will opt to move out with Happiness instead because both of these guys are clods*40Peace: “Why can’t she understand.  I can’t have a whole family when one of us is missing.  I must appease to the alien overlords in hopes that they see I can stand on my own, and raise my other two, in hopes they will see me fit to have my third back!  This plan must work!  It must!”

Still it’s a shitty excuse to dump your wife out of the blue like this.
41 Peace: “Nah man, I’m gonna make… peace.  We’ll fix this, and it’ll be easy to go back to the way it was before once I get my child.”

Cynthia: “I will slap you if you touch me.”42 Angela: “I chose to ignore the bullhockey downstairs with my grandchild and decided to spend the whole time making noise up here with my friend the billard table.”

She really does have a hard on for pool.43 Angela: *Attempts to use her ghosty psychic powers to cheat*

Gnome: “Nah, really I popped her in the nose with that ball.”

I don’t understand the trick trying to be done here.
44 Serenity was so sad from her parents divorce that she slept outside.  She also had no choice to do so, as there was a ghost out there, and she was scared.

Liam: “There’s no reason to be scared of me!  I can’t help it if in my ghost life stage that I grew a hunchback, I’m still the fantastic vibrate personality I always was.”

45 The exact thing you would do with your newly divorced ex upon finding out that they were leaving you to find an alien baby.

Cynthia: “Haha, you may have gone for my blind side, but you left yourself wide open!”

Peace: “Good thing we are using Cruelty’s pillows and not our own!”46 Cynthia: “WAIT, NO, I’m still made at you for divorcing me!”

Peace: “Can’t blame a man for trying…”47 Jada: “-and also while I was at work, there was a man that came in with his testicles hanging all the way out to here, and he asks for a ham sandwich, but he was being a fuckin’ obvious perv so I smacked him with our largest iron cast… are you even paying attention to my story, Wrath?!”48Wrath: “Ew gross!  What is this floating blue square of that gremlin’s face telling us that it thinks it’s still our kid?!”

Jada: “About fucking time, I swear.  We were going to launch her into the sun if she didn’t leave soon.”
49 Wrath: “Thank fuck it’s gone.  Now we can prepare room for it’s newer, better replacement!”

Jada: “It’s still part of our household, Wrath.”

Wrath: “What’s the difference between a vagina and a ziploc bag?”50Peace: “Soon I will find the home planet, and send them a strongly written encouragement letter about the safe return of my child.  I mean how many stars can I shuffle through before I find one with a life supporting planet with aliens on it?”

Surely this will end well.

Slowly Learning to do Things

1Julian: “It is time!  I finally become a man and leave the safety of my bathroom room forever!”

Cynthia: *Tries to escape getting roped into a distracting and annoying cheery animation loop and fails*

2Julian: “I thought I was supposed to grow a coat to help me survive the upcoming harsh winters.”

Cynthia: “JOHN!  Is that you?  I thought you died in a pile of garbage and IFs over at the junkyard years ago!”

3Julian finally left and instantly became a professional scuba diver, despite there not being any diving spots in Hidden Springs.  Sinking under the ground via glitches doesn’t count, but I don’t care, he’s not my problem anymore.

4Wrath: “Yes it is, since it can’t see the difference of living on the street where it belongs and living on our couch.”

Well, after I reset him, it won’t make a difference.  Goodbye Julian.  Don’t come back.

5Baal: “My fleas are holding a Marde Gras in my fur!”

6Baal: “Woo, what a party.  The festival has aged me horribly, but it was well worth it.  I’m going to go lay down and rest my weary old bones, and hope my eyeballs heal correctly.”

7Peace: “It’s so nice to no longer be carrying that mysterious baby weight I had.  As much as I miss my child, I missed holding you in my arms just as much.”

Cynthia: “And I missed this too.  Too bad we can’t go any further than this right now because of my deep seeded anger I still have towards you for accusing me of cheating.”

Forgiveness means going back to a FULL GREEN RELATIONSHIP BAR CYNTHIA, don’t make this difficult!

8Baal: “Marlena’s hungry.  She’s been bitching about it for a few hours.”

Jada: “Hopefully it will kill her, please let it happen.”

9Wrath: *Attempts to inform Jada on why her daughter was sent away to a shitty school, preferably while telling her a shitty joke, but eats her out instead*

Jada: “But this isn’t the way I wanted this to go down”

10Jada: “Your reasons of sending our stupid kid away are stupid and pointless.  Get ready for a titty down-town ground-pound.”

Wrath: “I thought I would be rewarded for sending the little hell spawn away!  This isn’t the a-tit-ention I wanted.”

11Wrath: “My wife may have given me breast cancer downstairs.  I will now take my anger out on this old bag.”


12Wrath: “No worries!  I’m out of bees, but I bought a new weather gun with my LTW points as a replacement!  Who’s ready to build a snowman?!”


13Hm.  The only thing the weather gun does is add a temporary cloud of weather.  I was kinda hoping it was automatically freeze them solid or over heat them or give them a sunburn or frost bite.  Not the torture device I thought it was.


I don’t even remember how old she is anymore.  Too old.  Please leave the plane of existence already, Marlena.

14Jada: “EW.  The new baby in this house is fucking disgusting.”

That’s not a baby.  That’s a dead cat.

Jada: “I can’t tell the difference.”

15Peace: “Haha I see the local bakery has dropped by its weekly delivery!  Who’s the cakes for this time?”

Cruelty: “Who do you think they are for, you old coot?!”

16Cake: *Candles light up in Peace’s presence*

Peace: “Well darn.”

Jada: “I don’t want to hear it, he’s just becoming an adult.  Boo hoo, mid life crisis already and come rub ointment on my old joints for fuck’s sake.”

17Cynthia: “Okie dokie!  Now that my husband has run off crying about his wasted youth, along with whatever other string of events he’s always tearing up over, it’s time for our precious little princess’s big moment!”

Wrath: *Contemplates just stabbing Cynthia in the eye with the fork but then how would she eat with a nasty bloody fork, they only give sims one fork to materialize out of thin air for the rest of their lives, it would be unsanitary*

18Aaand Justice’s absolutely precious as hell.  And a great mix of genetic material too!  I almost NEVER see that in this legacy.  Although I still would like to know how two blonde parents keep pumping out black haired children.

19Do my eyes deceive me?? Wrath and Marlena… CIVIL with each other?!  Within arm’s reach of each other!

Marlena: “The lack of bees have made her safe to be around for the time being.  And I’ve also gone partially deaf in my old age, so I no longer hear her cruddy bad jokes anymore.”

20Wrath: “What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?  ‘We better get some support before someone thinks we’re nuts!'”

I am starting to think you’ve lost your mind altogether.

21Same to you!  Although you’re no longer the heir, Happiness.  I’m afraid I can’t help you.  You waited too late for me to do anything about that.

Happiness: “This ‘forever’ thing is taking forever though.”

22Peace: “Oh, the bed here is still warm where me and Cynthia were just cuddling… Oh sweet Cynthia… please actually forgive me for accusing you of slander and let me take my pants off with you again…”

Someone really just needs to focus on his kids and career right now and stop being a whiny little leg-losing baby.

23Peace: “And just spending time with my youngest… SNIFF… I should be weening two precious sweethearts right now.  I can’t, I just can’t…”

Justice: “Does he have to hopelessly sob during snack time?  Like, every single time?”

I’m afraid so.

24Baal: “I’m so desperate for food that I’ve resorted to these corpse berries in the graveyard.  Mmm, just a face full of HARAGBWLJEKGJAD *insta pukes*”

I knew to be weary of horses eating the garden, but I didn’t figure the dogs would be up in them either.

25Wrath: “And if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like that bitch hadn’t fainted at all?”

Cruelty: “We can’t just ignore it, mom.  She’s a public disgrace of our name.”

26Wrath: “How the fuck did I get out here?  I don’t work out.”

The fact that she’s doing something other than loafing around in the spot I left her in when I went to check on Peace is shocking.  Like, WOW, they are DOING stuff!

And Serenity, where are you going??


Holy shit, WHY are you people doing things?!  You people NEVER do things on your own!

28Cynthia: “Haha, didn’t you hear, Serenity?  We really love to do things, we do all kinds of things when the computer lady isn’t watching.  We just love screwing with her head.”

Ugh, that sounds about right.

29Marlena: “Hee hee, see?  Even I do things frequently!  Instead of standing in the hallway for hours on end, I’ve decided to… stand out in the playground for hours on end!  Hah, I’m so witty!”

I hate you.

30Wrath: *Continues to absorb Jada’s face*

Jada: “And here I thought I would get no action in my old age.”

Baal: “I’m not even going to look.”

31Ahh, yes.  There’s nothing like painting the midnight sky.  Especially when said sky is fused with the lake and destroys the balance of life on earth, along with any perspective points Peace was painting.  May we all suffer little in the upcoming falling sky apocolypse.

32Peace: “She was right here… She wasn’t away from me for two minutes, and then she was gone forever… They could have at least took me to court for a custody hearing, I mean, aliens have equal rights laws, right?  Sniff sniff sob…”

Justice: “As much as I love you, dad, I want mom to come take care of me from now on.  Alright?”

33Justice: “Speaking of mom, Holy Shia Labeouf!  She’s still doing things!  It’s about time someone noticed that putt putt mat.”

Cynthia: “You know, you talk a lot for a baby that hasn’t even started learning to talk yet.  It’s really killing my focus.”

Justice: “Yeah I can tell.  You aren’t even using any of the balls.”

Peace: “Why are rocks constantly spawning on our patio?  Are we using migratory rock bait to lure them onto our property or something?”

34Marlena: “I’m still doing stuff too!  I’ve moved from the playground to the workshop shower!  I’ve been here all night!  Never tell me I’m not a busybody!”

Wrath: “I’m actually running out of serious patience and witty jokes in these situations.”

35Wrath: “Hey look.  I found more bees.”


36I feel like this is one of those “I hate kids”-“But you were a kid once” kind of arguments.

Marlena: “I heard he’s going through a mid life crisis and is taking it out on himself pretty hard.  That or he got into a fight with a flat screen tv.  Either way it’s a shame they called me to do something about it.  I really would hate to have to leave my spot in the hallway and let it get cold while I deal with other people’s life issues.”

37Wrath: “How do you get a baby in a mailbox?  With a stamp!”

Cruelty: “Oh fuck.  She found where we hid her shitty joke books.”

Along with a phonebook because it’s time to throw a party!

38It’s a Halloween party, so you can tell how late this chapter was supposed to be posted.

Alien Chief Gordon Ramsey: “Wow, that is the most accurate Shrek costume I’ve ever seen!”

Florida Man: “I’m… not even in costume…”

39Cruelty: “Well someone is going to have to change.”

Cynthia: “And as the elder, I don’t have to!  Haha, yaay, it’s so much fun to be an adult, finally!”

Cruelty: “Bullshit.”

40Wrath: “Hey, twiddlefuck.  Wearing your work uniform to a costume party is NOT a costume.  Lazy ass gets 14 bees.”

Cruelty: “And if you change into another damn cheerleader outfit, I’m going to throw more than bees at you.”

41Betsy: “Hey Peace!  It’s been a long time since I’ve last been here!  I have good news for you!  You and mama are going to be grandparents!”

Peace: “Actually it’s only been a couple of days…”

Betsy: “Grandbabies, Peace!  Grandbabies!

42Happiness: “You do know the dance floor is on the other side of the wall, right?”

Alien Idontknowhername: “Wrath invited me to her holloween party because she thought it would be nice for me to finally meet the man that carried one of our recent experiments for 9 months.  He sobbed the second I came in the door.  Wrath thought it was hilarious, but I have to stand back here because every time Peace sees me he bursts out in tears and it’s annoying.”

Wrath: “I like my women like I like my cereal 😉 in small boxes stored in the pantry.”

44Wrath: “Woohooo!  Time to hike up to the bedroom, I’m about to make dick jokes.”

Jada: “Who gave me this costume?  This was a terrible life decision.”

45Florida: “Lamest party ever.”

Loyalty: “I won’t say anything about my family’s party.  But yawns are contagious.  And more fun.  Yawn with us Cruelty.”

Cruelty: “I should have gone to the school with my sister and avoided this hell.”


Brave: *Shows up 4 hours late with no Starbucks*

Peace: “She wasn’t even invited.  Definitely still not invited if she’s going to wear the same thing I did.”

Baal: *breaks neck in feeble attempt to leave*


Happiness: “I may have contributed to the puddle.  You don’t know.  There is no proof of it.”

48Brave: “Party was shit.  Bye mom.”

Happiness: “Thanks for at least stopping by and leaking all over the floor, dear.  Don’t call us, we’ll call you.”

Cynthia: “And since it was your child, you people get to mop up tonight.  Ugh.  My clean floors.  It hadn’t even been clean for one whole day…”

49Happiness: “Now this is what I’m talking about!  Winter is finally in the air, and everything is covered in a beautiful layer of icy crystal.  Everything is so beautiful when it glitters.  Just like me!”

50Cynthia: “Look, Peace!  I still know how to do stuff!  Learning how to do things is fun!”

Peace: “If only my child could learn to go to the bathroom instead of playing games in the backyard though.  I’m going to close my eyes and pretend she didn’t just pee all over the patio.

Maybe they’ll still be moving around and doing things the next time I get back to these guys.  Who knows.  I’m so used to broken games I wouldn’t be surprised if they all stand collectively in one spot and do nothing for the rest of their lives the next time I open this game.

I Demand Justice

Welcome back to the Fallens.  Last chapter we came back from an unintentional hiatus, and between the baby skilling and LTW grinding, Peace got impregnated by aliens.  So far it seems like everyone’s excited for a little baby alien…….

*Nervous laughter that devolves into sobbing*

1Agony: “Ooooh, look what I get to play with, and you don’t…”

Serenity: “That’s NOT fair!  I want an IF to play with toooo!” *Screams and smashes her thumbs off*

2There we go, now no one has an IF and everyone is equal again!  Are you two babies happy now?!

I actually think the junkyard has the entire collection of IFs now though, now that I think about it.  They remind me of little cheap McDonald’s trinkets you get in happy meals.  I’d collect them.

3Happiness: “Thank the good Maker!  Someone finally remembered I’ve been living on the street this whole time!”

That’s not my fault.  Well it could be.  Happiness has a bunch of shows he does around town, and since he’s still making us a lot of money, I can’t help that he gets confused and ends up bumming it around town because he can’t remember his own route home until like, two hours, before his next show.

Briana: “Actually I do not think we’ve ever even met.  Anyway, it’s nice to find a fellow hobo as styish as me.  What’s yo numbah?”

While we are standing outside of the school though, let’s skulk around looking at more potential heirs shall we?

4Happiness: “Ok wow, let’s not skulk for heirs anymore, I’m scared.”

Jarrett: “Wow, rude.  It’s just a poorly unrendered plant.”

He’s growing up way too fast.  I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not.

5Since Peace’s little alien incident, he’s been wanting to go the future and the past in the time machine.  Unfortunately, he only stays in the time machine for a couple of seconds before it spits him back out, fulfilling neither of his wishes.

Peace: “The stupid machine is giving me this “one person capacity” silliness.  It’s not funny!  Just because I’m gaining a little weight doesn’t call for jokes like that.”

6Cynthia: “Woohooed and then put back into the corner.  Is this what my life has resorted to in the end?”

You’re the idiots who’d rather stand around until you piss yourselves, so I don’t want to hear it.  Just stay there and stare out the window for another eight hours, see if I give a shit.

7Peace is rounding out the last of his skills for his LTW, and he’s taken up painting virtually everything in mosaic and grids.  I guess because he’s a genius and/or computer whiz.  I like them.  When this is all said and done, I’m keeping the majority of them.

8Yeah, taking a break from work and school, like my sims haven’t been doing that the whole time anyway.

9Fantastic choice, Wrath.  We don’t even have a swimming pool.

Wrath: “The hot tub should count.”

Yes, yes it should.

Wrath: “A hot tub full of BEES”

Let’s leave the actual planning part to Peace or someone else.

10Brave: “Oh man, bruh.  I need your help, Briana.  I’m seeing the weirdest Shrek OC I never thought I’d dream up.  Dear Heaven please pull me through this and I’ll cut back on my natural herb garden.”

Briana: “I was concerned for the giant man orange too but while you’re wearing a bikini bottom that skimpy, I’m not doing a damn thing for you, lady.”

Charity: *Agrees with Briana because she’s completely too much of a prude to even wear a bathing suit to the party*

11Briana: “Now I think I’m getting a contact high from just standing next to you.  There’s a vampire with a very tiny, and naked, butt standing here with a duck floatie.”

Brave: “Oh snap, bruh.  I think I’m seein it too.”

I don’t even have to invite Jaime to anything anymore.  He just shows up anyway.  Kind of endearing to know Happiness does still have a friend out there that still doesn’t own a decent pair of pants.

12By the way, there’s your pool for the party, guys.  Go nuts.

Briana: “I’m pretty sure that’s a trap for a drowning death.  I’m going home.”

Brave: “Same here.”

So everyone went home almost instantly and the party was “decent”.

13Cynthia: “I have good news for you, Serenity!  You’re going to be a big sister!  Isn’t that just swell!”

Serenity: “That’s good and all, but did we have to go ALL THE WAY into someone else’s yard for you to feed me, I mean”

14Jada: “Congradulation on your shitty party almost tanking Wrath.  It was so bad that I had to beat up that Brave girl and steal her bikini bottom to make up for the shitty time I was having.”

Wrath: “What does spaghetti meat balls and dead babies have in common?  They both spend a delicate amount of time in a meat grinder.”

Jada: “No one wants to eat your dead baby spaghetti, Wrath.”

15Jada: “Whoa, what the fuck was that?  That had to be the worst bathing suit I’ve ever seen anyone have the audacity to call a bathing suit.”

Wrath: “Don’t worry, I’m about to take care of that.”

16Wrath: “For thinking you can even pull that off, 9 bees.”


Peace: *Background gagging noises*

17I really hoped everyone would stay for the massive birthday set up we’re hurling at half the household, but since the pool party lasted 10 seconds, that’s not the case I suppose.  Best we go on and get this over with.

18Betsy: “I’m so excited!  I actually get a cake for my birthday!  Wow, I’m just so thrilled that I’m gonna go ahead and grow up right here!”

Well I guess when I look at it this way, I save $30.  Thanks for that then, Betsy.

19Betsy was always my favorite since she rarely ever did anything wrong and was politely out of my way for the most part.  She actually grew up quite cute, so I hope she moves out into a nice little home and not where ever her sister and father ended up at.

20Cruelty: “Dear Guardian Demon of Wishes, hear my command and make it true.  I wish that I do not grow up to wear skanky hooker outfits that I’m currently forced to look at.”

21Too bad, so sad.

Cruelty: “Fuck a duck.”

She’s now a virtuoso, which is whatever bleh.  Moving on.

22Jada: “I see it’s time for my beautiful ELDER birthday, isn’t it?”

Isn’t it fantastic to be married into a legacy late in life?

Jada: “Hahaha.  Hell no.”

23Jada: “Aw, they took my sexy bikini bottom away, that’s not cool.”

Cruelty: *Becomes so disgusted with her mother that she turns into Betsy*

24Happiness: “Oh no.  I think my son ate a whole cake.”

Peace: “All this extra padding that poofed on me has upset me so much!  I feel like the only thing that’s going to make me feel better is if I go yell at my wife for being unfaithful to me.”





Cynthia: “I don’t even know, I never have an opportunity to get out of the house!  I swear I didn’t do anything wrong and this is stressing me out!”




28Peace: “Oh good gravy, I’m so sorry!  I just have been so emotional since I gained this weight.  I’m also really sad since my nose fell off, have you seen it anywhere??”

29Cynthia: “Sigh, you really have been mushy since that alien touched your butt.  Fine, you’re forgiven.”

Peace: “Fantastic!  We should really get that boom boom boom on, later, you know, whenever I lose some of this water weight.”

Cynthia: “Ah yes.  “Water weight”.  Sure.”

30Peace: “Now that me and your mother have worked out that that Van guy is a liar and a scam, let’s finally get your birthday underway, ok sweetie?”

31Serenity grew up fine, she’s now a coward though.  So I guess I’m wrong, she didn’t grow up fine.  Who forgot to potty train her?!

Me, I guess that was me.

32Peace: “Something’s wrong!  The extra weight is trying to push itself out of me and it hurts!  Call an ambulance, Wrath!”

Wrath: *Would rather tell her shitty jokes to the shower than give a damn*

33Peace: “I am now peeing my favorite color!  I’m so conflicted right now!  What is even happening to my genitals?!”

34Peace: “My… my very own baby!  Well diddly dang darn!  Not sure which organ you came out of, but I feel the love of a parent, just as I did when I found out Cynthia had Serenity.”




36Peace: “Rommach and the other aliens can go probe and harvest some other sim’s alien baby, because this one is mine.  This is my baby girl, and they cannot have her.”

37Peace: “Do you hear that, you crazy alien fuchsias?!  This is MY baby!  Touch my child, and I will swear a wrath unlike you have ever seen!!”

Wrath: “Nah, they’ve already seen me, I stand outside naked all the time.”

38Peace: “Oh, they… took my child anyway.  Ooh.”

I thought a child service agent was going to come pick her up and I was just going to kill them but, ok teleportation makes more sense…

And I can’t even find the baby in MC.  I can’t even force it to come back.  This isn’t how I wanted my first alien baby to go down.

RIP Itszumi, Itazutil, Yzma, whatever your name was.  I do hope to see you again one day, but I apparently don’t know what I’m doing.

39Brave: *Has overdosed on nature*

Wrath: “I think it’s time to set her straight on the “great outdoors”, huehuehuehuehuehue”

40Wrath: “W…wow.  She used her great natural magic to turn into a plant when I threw the bees at her.  Now I feel like I’M the one on drugs…”

41Serenity: “So you’re the big brother I heard stories about.  Granted they aren’t really good stories.  They always start like, “once upon a time, there lived a Bathroom Troll”…”

Julian: “No, that sounds about right.  Welcome to my humble abode, I would recommend you not touch anything in here.”

Obviously, Julian doesn’t touch anything in here either.

42Wrath: *Hilariously mocks Marlena*


43Wrath: “Ah yes, I feel full and happy watching you swell with welts.  Behold, all my happy LTW sparkles are so tickley.”


44*Feels the warm tickley sensation of childbirth*


Unfortunately, Peace is busy with his LTW, and I don’t like breaking him between canvases, so just go on and birth it out here in the bathroom, Cynthia.  You’ll be FINE.


Cynthia: “Stinks that you have to be pink, seeing as your father really wanted another green child in his life so much that he popped one out himself.  Too bad he failed.  Ah well.  You’ll just have to try extra hard to make it up for him.”

This child is named Justice, especially since what I think those aliens did to Peace wasn’t ethical at all.  I WANT MY RETRIBUTION.

Her favorites include latin, firecracker shrimp, and the color blue, AGAIN.  Getting a little tired of all the blue, but I guess at least it’s not green.  She’s a little couch potato, and she came with good locked in, so she will be the heiress unless Serenity gets the trait as well before her YA birthday.

46Cynthia: “You will bunk with your big sister for now, Justice.  And when your father stops boohooing all over the house, I hope you two will become good acquaintances.”

Peace: “Poor little Ibbajibba won’t ever get to meet her baby sister… she never even got to meet her older sister.  This room feels so empty to me, even with the loss of just one :(”

Cynthia: “You don’t even remember her name!”

47Agony: “Well I have a surprise for you guys!  It’s my birthday!  TADA!  It snuck up on everyone!  Either give me a cake or please place your neck in between my hands here.”

Sorry about that Agony.  Not only did I forget, but I don’t think I would have cared if I hadn’t anyway.

48Agony: “Well you know who would care?  Our family car sitting in my mother’s inventory.  He’ll be my friend, I bet.”

She’s rolled vehicle enthusiast.  What a fantastic trait to waste a trait slot on.

49Wrath: “I am out of the bees.  So as her punishment, I want her to go to the Peace and Love school.”


50Wrath: “The real reason I’m sending you away is because I’m too fucking lazy to buy you your own bed in buy mode, just as I’m too lazy to move Cruelty’s bed into your bedroom.  But here’s the deal.  Answer one of my riddles, and you may stay here with us.”

Agony: “You know what, nevermind, fuck that, I’ll just go pack my bags.”

51Wrapping this chapter up with the third child of the Florida Men.  All three of their children’s names start with a J, and I’m actually really excited to see if they will have a fourth and continue the line.  Especially since they seem all about getting knocked up two seconds after popping out the last one.


Crash Landing

Oh lord, it’s been over 5 months since I last updated, hasn’t it…

That’s a long time to not give a shit about the Fallen family.  In the time that I could have updated, half a fetus’ could have developed or something.  I’m not good at comparing time events.  Apparently I compare everything to a full term pregnancy.  I think that’s just something I do.

Wow, off topic.  Alrighty, so what did we leave the Fallen clan doing when we were last here?  It’s an honest question, because I don’t remember.

1Wrath: *Punches Marlena in the uterus*

Marlena: “The jokes on you Wrath, that doesn’t work anymore.  We know, we tried.”

Happiness: “Oh, how we tried.”

Agony: *Stews in five month’s worth of baby shit*

2Apparently the sims themselves don’t remember what’s happened since the last time we played.  Happiness is apparently jacked for his son’s graduation, despite the fact that Peace is like 30 or something.  I at least remember that much.

3Cynthia: “Yeah.  We’ve come to the conclusion that you are, in fact, a bathroom troll.  Because this is nasty.”

Julian: *Grieves for Mephistopheles for 153 days*

4Jada: “Oh hell, this still lives in here.”

I see no one’s composure towards the babies have changed.  Nothing like just coming in to complain about them and then doing nothing about them.  I see why I stopped playing.

5Jada: “And YOU.  What the fuck did you do to that toilet?!  Where am I supposed to piss now because it’s not going to be on that nasty-ass busted thing.  How about I go pee in your bed, how would you like that?!”

Julian: *About to start boohooing about the cat for 5 hours straight*

6Auuuuuwwwgh, I’m already so thrilled to be back with these guys again.

Julian: *Marathoning that shit*

7Julian: “Now it’s my turn.”

Jada: “Heh.”

Peace: “I don’t want to say it, but I really do feel like I live in a circus sometimes.”

8Serenity: “It’s time that some of them died off, daddy!”

Peace: “I know that’s not the right mindset we’re supposed to have, sweetheart, but you may be right…”

The compassion on the good side of the family is apparently wearing thin, I see.

9Wrath: “They have accepted me as their queen, and do as I command.  It’s fabulous, even though they can’t bring me anything heavier than an empty beer can.  And they don’t understand jokes very well.  Nevermind, this is quite boring.”

10Marlena: “Many many stings have rendered my nervous system worthless, Wrath.  I can no longer feel.  Sorry, but your idea of torture just isn’t gonna cut it for you anymore.”


12Briana: “Hm.  You seem to have lost that ghostly green glow you had about you, Serenity.  Here, drink more of these nasty green bottles until that color comes back.”

I’m pretty sure that NO BRIANA

13The massive amount of food being thrown at the baby confused her and she fled by warping outside onto the balcony on the other side of the wall.  She took the second bottle with her.

14Wrath: “And now I can no longer interact with my own baby.”


Agony: “You should make Briana suffer for this, mother.”

Wrath: “I sure as hell will.”

15Wrath: “For endangering the life of my child in a food-related limbo, that’s 60 bees, Briana.  Buzz buzz.  Get rekt.”


16Yeah Jada.  Work for dat paper.

17Wrath: “On my way to fix my broken baby.  So a prison escapee breaks out of prison, much like I have broken my arm just now-”

What’s so damn hard about you people using the stairs?

18Wrath: “Someone’s put lube on the top of the pole!  Who the fuck does that?!  Jada!  Get over here and pop my arm back into my shoulder!”

Jada: “I haven’t had my nightly Hot Pocket yet, Wrath, so do it yourself.”

19Jada: “For fuck’s sake, is no one going to stop that screaming brat?!  Do I have to do it myself?!  I’m gonna end up doing it myself, aren’t I.”

Wrath: “I’m trying!  But this pole!  A stripper, a prostitute and a nun are sitting at a bus stop talking about stuff…”

20Wrath: “Oh, I see you reached the child before I did… and you actually fed it instead of stomping on it like I thought you’d… ok then!  I’m going to go back downstairs again!  Wee!”

The pole was deleted.

21Jada’s decency was short lived though.

Peace: “We actually have more beds than we do people in this house.  I don’t understand.”

Neither do I.


Ah, here’s something I don’t understand, while we are on the subject.  I do not think Julian has ever gone to school, ever.  His sisters have gone a couple of times, some times they don’t, but I do not believe he himself has ever needed to get on the school bus.  Every time this clock runs down, it resets back to 24.

22Meanwhile, sims like Cruelty, the ACTUAL children of this legacy, always have to get on the bus.

Julian: “Papa Peace takes pity on me because my actual dad doesn’t love me, so I never have to go!”

24Maybe after he ages up he’ll have to take educational responsibility.

Betsy: “Daddy?!  Is that you”

25Wrath: “For automatically causing the camera to pan over to someone that isn’t me and making me think that Marlena was finally dying and falsely raising my hopes, that’s four bees.”

Julian: *Doesn’t even know what four is because he’s unlearned*

26Wrath: “Oh bee friend.  One day, the camera will pan, and her corpse will light up our lifes, just like it should.  Ahh.  That would be nice.  Let’s go sting her right now.”

27Wrath: “The Dark Lords are failing me.  Why does she not die??”

Jada; “Now that I think about it, bees should be a viable death option.”

28Cruelty: “How the shit is this fair?!  Those other kids at the house don’t have to go to school, so why do I?!”

So she lost her queue and fuck ever hoping for her to get school honors, Wrath.  While we are waiting for her mother to come down to the school to herd her into the buiding, I took the opportunity to look at potential future spouses.

29Here we have an evil sim and a good sim right off the bat.  Sandi is the purple chick and she is evil, and is apparently dating another evil sim somewhere in town.  Dereck is the red head, but unfortunetely he’s Envy’s grandson or something.  Pretty sure his good trait has made him the family reject.

And the pink kid in the back is a broken dumbass and has no importance.

30Alton is Dereck’s twin I think, and while he has neither trait, he’s actually really cool to look at.  Sucks he’s related to the Fallens already.

The chick he’s stuck in is Beatriz, who’s actually a Secksie decendant.  She’s cute as well.

Neither have good/evil traits, but they are my favorite so far, and there’s still some hope for them next birthday or something.

31Here’s an evil fairy.  Ew.  I like him.

32Peace: “Look at him, sleeping all peacefully, he doesn’t need to be yelled at, he has a hard enough life as it is.  Maybe he’ll feel up to going to school in the morning instead then.”

And maybe he was a waste of our time.

32Ah hah hah, well then.  This guy sent Marlena a tombstone in the mail.  Dropping a hint there, for us eh?  I like the way this Jevon guy thinks.

33Wrath: “I finally made it all the way up to the school!  First and formost, if you light a school bus full of children on fire, will they make a sound?”

Cruelty: “Mom, it’s 4 in the afternoon, school is over so don’t even bother.”

34Wrath: “You’ve always been a dissappoint.  53 bees.”

Cruelty: “AAAaahh.  Oh.  The bees didn’t even show up.  That’s… that’s a good sign I guess, but did you just throw bees at your own daughter?!”

Chadwick back there is a good sim.  I should bookmark that shit.

35Peace: “Why must you always be up here hogging up Serenity when you know I’m on my way to take care of her?!  Briana, can I not spend any time with my little baby?”

Briana: “Shhhh, soon, Serenity.  Soon, I will successfully imprint into you my will, and you will too learn to not trust that whore of a mother of yours nor that slinky little man you call father…” *Mindmelds with toddler*

Peace: *Sweats profusely*

36Wrath: “For touching other people’s babies, that’s gonna be… hmm… does any one else here that buzzing sound?”

Briana: “Am I just not allowed to have a say in what goes on around here?!”

37I guess the bee venom enhanced her puberty rapidly, because Briana then had her birthday and YA’d all over the floor.

Wrath: “Good.  Get the hell out of my house.”

I tried to move Briana back in with her father since that’s what she seems to want, but I could not find John in any of the houses in town, but he’s still alive according to the tree.  Go figure.  He’s probably slumming in some drug alley, I don’t know.  So Briana was kicked to the streets.  She’s with her father now.  Bye bitch.

38Next couple of days involved nothing but baby skilling.

Wrath, you can’t teach the baby to shit in the toilet by trying to shit in the toilet with her, just… just for the record.


40Peace: “NO”


Wrath: “Hey look.  They’re gonna come in Peace.”


Cynthia: “I’ve already made that joke though.  Whatever.  I’m going to bed.”

42Two seconds later.

Space ship: *Crashes in the street*

43Peace: “Wow, that was the quickest abduction I’ve ever heard of.  You don’t seem to know how to alien very well.”

Rommach: “Wow really, and after I offered to walk you to the door and kiss you goodnight.”


Maybe that will be the last we hear from him then.

45Peace: “Wow mom.  Are you sure we can’t have Betel back?  Or at least let me hire a maid, because this place is getting rank.”

Shh, leave her be, Peace, she’s ACTUALLY doing something other than standing in the hallway being stank.  Maybe if we stay very quiet and avoid eye contact with her, she’ll keep doing something…


Wrath: “THERE you are Jada.  I haven’t seen you in a few days.  Nice to see you finally fell out of the wall.”

47Jada: “Why we here”

Wrath: “I want sexy time, and our bed is broken (WOW WHAT A SURPRISE).  Also I want a baby, and we need to crank one out before Peace and Cynthia do, since Briana’s vacant spot isn’t going to be there forever.  So pants off, and get me a gavel.  We’re going to try something hot.”

48Isn’t nature amazing.

49Peace: “Oh.  What a surprise.  The kitchen is still a horrible mess.”

Cynthia: “You really trusted your mother to actually clean this mess, didn’t you.  That’s really sad, Peace.”

50Cynthia: “But if you want, we can leave this kitchen and go do… other matters.  In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not wearing pants…”

Peace: “NICE”

Cynthia: “I’d like you to show me just exactly what you learned from those aliens…”

Betsy and Julian: “NOT NICE”

51Cynthia and Peace: “VERY NICE”

52OF COURSE halfway through the woohoo I notice this.  I thought we were safely past this, APPARENTLY NOT

Peace: “It’s ok, a little fat to last me through the winter won’t hurt me!”

It’s summer.

53Cynthia: “Great.  We’re both going to be getting fat, aren’t we…”

MAYBE.  Who knows, maybe Wrath or Jada might?!  WHO KNOWS?!  I know.  and I won’t say anything until next chaptah.

54 Nascar: “We murdered them.  We murdered the last family there for the change of scenery.”

Veronica: “It’s ok though!  Because you should see the view we get from the kitchen window now!”

55Also I’m 99.99% sure that Cortney and Janna are related.  You know.  I have a hunch.

56And the Floridians have bred again.  At least their babies names go together, they got that going for them.  Anyway, let us see their first offspring, since it survived it’s first birthday.

57Hmmm.  He looks almost… normal compared to them.  Maybe the future will hold more answers for this little weirdo.